Until We Die
by Hell's Nightingale
Summary: Sakura cannot forgive her past. She hates the pity that she's given daily. Happiness is just something she can't comprehend. However, Ino can. InoSaku SakuIno Ino Sakura Yuri InoxSakura SakuraxIno InoxSaku SakuxIno InoSakura SakuraIno Non-AU Rated M
1. Tears don't fall, they crash around me

Sakura eyed the familiar office room. She had started coming here last year, late in the winter. She didn't like it but she was forced to under the rules of Tsunade that were directed entirely to her. The rule was: Emotionally unstable shinobi required counseling until tested stable again. Her fingers drummed the wooden arm of her cushioned chair. Her psychologist was rarely late. However, today was one of those unique days.

As soon as she said that, Hinata entered through the door with a sigh. She nodded towards Sakura, silently thanking her for her patience before scurrying around her desk and taking her seat. She grabbed some papers on the side of the desk and examined them. Sakura watched as her emotionless, white eyes read what the essay said. Sakura already knew what the papers contained because she was the one who wrote them. Hinata had previously assigned her to write the papers on her situation and what she felt about it. _Everybody knows how I'm feeling_, Sakura bitterly whispered. She didn't know why people wanted to spill her guts to them. They knew how she felt but wouldn't leave her alone. Sakura didn't want to tell all her insecurities. _Ninjas don't show emotions_, Sasuke said so_. A good ninja tries not to burden others_, Naruto said once. For a split-second, Sakura squeezed her eyes shut. _They were only a part of the past now_.

Hinata sighed as she skimmed the paper for the fourth time.

"Sakura-san, the way you describe the emotions and events…you sound very formal and detached." Hinata confronted. Sakura averted her eyes to a painting on the wall and remained quiet. What was she supposed to do? Was she going to make it into a sob story or did she have to put emotion into? Hinata only asked her to write down what happened and the emotions, not a full blown novel. Sakura didn't even feel like talking about it today. Couldn't they post pone it to next Friday? She might actually listen and try to get help that day. But, right now she just wanted to go home and study on the B-rank mission she had next month. Her team wasn't decided upon yet. _Team 7 would've went but it has been broken for a long time_, Sakura reminded herself. She tightly gripped the edge of her chair.

"To me, it seems like you're holding back your emotions." Hinata gave a sympathetic frown. Sakura saw it in the corner of her eyes and felt repelled by the act of concern. She could take care of herself and her emotions. They would subside eventually over time. Rushing it, especially with counseling, would only make matters worse. However, Sakura couldn't complain or miss the sessions unless she wanted to be pounded into a bloody pulp. Tsunade was just making things more complicated than it was. Sakura bit her lip, suppressing her aggravation.

"_Sakura_," Hinata said, removing the formal edge on her name, "as a new counselor, fellow shinobi, and _friend_, I'm concerned about you and your emotional conflicts. I can't help you unless you want me to, and it troubles me to see you pushing me away from helping." Hinata's eyes bore into Sakura's. _I will not look at her_, Sakura repeated while fixing her gaze to the plant in the corner. She had heard before that Hyūga' s had the power to feel another's emotions by just staring into their eyes, but Sakura also heard that Hyūga's could see through your clothes by a drunken Lee. It only made Sakura even more paranoid during her counseling. _Why am I scared to go here?_ Sakura pondered lightly but quickly released the thought. She didn't know and didn't really care.

"Sakura," Hinata urged. She wished that Hinata wasn't her counselor so she could just barricade herself and act snotty. _Maybe that's why Tsunade listed Hinata as my only choice_, Sakura gave more points to her sensei's logic. Tsunade knew that she adamantly hardened herself so her emotions wouldn't leak, but her sensei continued to try and pry open her rock-hard shell.

"Please talk, at least." Hinata pleaded. Sakura pushed her thoughts away. She was zoning too much, which meant that it looked like she was noticeably ignoring Hinata, that'd also be reported as a non-successive attempt to pry her open which ultimately led to Tsunade grumping with Sakura.

"Sorry, I was just thinking of your words." Sakura lied with a light smile. Hinata's face lightened up with a happy smile. _As long as I get out of here quicker_, Sakura schemed in her mind. She looked at Hinata, to improve the chance of Hinata reporting 'positive emotional development'.

"I think you're right," Sakura murmured. _Entering emotional-confession-sounding-voice_, Sakura gave a big sigh to add another dramatic touch. Hinata slowly grabbed her clipboard, not wanting to disturb Sakura's moment. It was time to end these sessions quickly so she could continue on with her life in peace.

"I-I just…I don't feel comfortable with telling people because…it's painful to unbury the feelings and I end up crying…just like a baby." Sakura bitterly laughed at the end. Hinata nodded and scribbled down her mysterious notes.

"I just…miss them… a lot…how we were…and the last day, it was just—"Sakura was cut off by the alarm. She glanced down to the kitchen timer that was used to time their sessions. Funny enough, it was in the shape of a dairy cow. Hinata smiled and gracefully turned the timer off.

"I'm sorry but we'll pick this up next month on the second Friday of October. It was good to further our progress," Hinata gave a soft, toothy smile as she collected her clipboard and cup of tea. She walked pass Sakura, who stood up and courteously watched Hinata exit the room, but was caught off guard when the smaller girl stopped with the door open.

"However," Hinata said before turning towards Sakura with a shameless grin, "I expect you to not act like a distressed marionette controlled by your devious, intelligent side, _Sakura_. But, we did make progress, whether you noticed or not"

Sakura stiffened as Hinata stared at her longer than she would've liked before finally leaving. The wooden door closed as Sakura blankly stared at it. _Was it that noticeable?_

Rather than feeling irritated or dumb, Sakura felt guilty for being found out. She tried to make a fool out of Hinata, but only had it backfire. She had underestimated Hinata, a member of the famous Hyūga clan, a ninja of the same rank of Jōnin, and most importantly, a friend. Sakura felt the need to move around, get a little warmed up before attempting to train. She hadn't stretched her muscles in awhile, let alone accomplish an advanced physical workout. She attempted to fill her head up with the upcoming training. She blocked out the guilt like most of her other emotions.

_I need to get out of here and get some fresh air._ Sakura slowly shambled out of the office room.

* * *

The small groups of people parted to let Sakura through, oblivious of the crowds as she read up on her mission.

_B-rank  
Requirements: Medical Assistance S/P, be able to fight S/A, and physical support S/A/P. Extra supply of weaponry.  
Reward: 165, 000 Ryō__** (1) **__  
Teammates: Undetermined _

_Synopsis:  
The terrain of the mission area is steep and…_

Sakura bit into her apple as she walked through the main street of Konoha, ironically the busiest without a care in the world for the people. She received a few glares for casually walking through without pardoning herself when she ran into people. Sakura continued to beeline through the street until she noticed red ink on the bottom of her paper.

_Due to financial cutbacks on weapon supply, shinobi __are required__ to buy their own extra equipment. A medium of five kunais, 10 shurikan, one smoke bomb package, and one ration will be supplied from the armory. Any extra supplies required while training or during missions will be at the __Shinobi's expense__. _

Sakura's face soured as she stopped walking and reread the piece of writing. How unfair that rule was. However, rules were rules. Sakura turned around, detouring off her original route to the training grounds and headed towards the local, public armory. Sakura reached behind her to search through her kunai pouch where her money was hid. She felt around until she touched a familiar stash of coins. Sakura lightly smiled as she fished out the cash, attracting some unwanted attention as well that was thankfully warded off by her ninja headband.

Sakura turned off the main street where the novelty stores were. When she turned the corner, the street became less extravagant and populated as steam from the armory filled the air above her. The sound of metal clanked in the distance, echoing off the walls. The temperature around Sakura quickly rose a few degrees as she neared the shop. A few shinobi walked pass her, new cloth-covered weapons in hand.

"The new rule is bogus."

"We can die any second in the battle and they won't at least give us more weapons! We might need the—"

"—yeah but the reconstruction of the village had cost a lot. We still have awhile to go until we pay back some debts."

Sakura eyed the bunch until they finally disappeared around a building, heading towards the bustling streets. She rolled her eyes at them. All they could do was complain about their job. They should be happy that they were just alive. Sakura glared at the ground as she finally stopped in front of the open shack. _Ninjas don't complain. They do their job, and they do it right!_

_Naruto…_

Sakura lifted the cloths draping down from the roof to enter. She was instantly met with searing heat and clouds of steam. She felt her face burn and the hot air make her face moist. She quickly moved her surprise by swatting the cloud away and ducking underneath it.

A man's laughter erupted from inside. "Oh my, you put the iron in there too long! Have fun molding with it!"

A female's voice groaned in dismay. Sakura's brows furrowed. She heard the voice before…

She wasn't given another second to mull over the thought when a large, looming man appeared from the steam. He didn't even notice her as he walked pass her and folded the advertisement cloths up. He sighed, taking in the freshness of the air and blue sky. Sakura stared up at his back. He was easily about seven foot. Two feet taller than Sakura, give or take. His arms were loaded with muscles that bulged in defiance. Every part of his body was muscle. His head had short, dark brown hair that stuck out everywhere in small groups. Sakura noted that he was a foreigner.

"You really did it now, dear." He humorously hummed while lightly chuckling every now and then. He turned around to notice Sakura, staring up at him like a shameless child. He blinked profusely while staring down at her before giving her a hearty smile.

"I'm starting to like that new rule, we had a lot of customers ever since." He hollered to the hidden backroom. Sakura looked where he yelled towards and noticed a hallway that snaked to the right. _It must be where the tempering takes place_, Sakura noted as she saw the fiery red dance across the stone walls. She stared as a dark, distinct shadow of somebody ran across the wall. Soon the sound of the hammer meeting metal echoed throughout the place. This continued for a few more seconds before another groan of aggravation erupted. The man laughed.

"Miss, you can take care of this customer. I pity you and your poor metal. But I give you A for effort." He sang in his thick voice as he walked into the back. The woman murmured something that Sakura couldn't comprehend. The man laughed some more. Soon, the man's shadow disappeared and the woman's appeared, given the smaller frame. However, she was much bigger than Sakura anticipated. It was only until it drew nearer and nearer did the shadow get smaller and smaller. Sakura glanced away, not wanting to stare at the worker when she came out. Instead, she occupied herself by looking at the weapons for sale. There were the oddities of northern and western weapons sitting about, more for show than sale but the price tag on them told otherwise. She continued to search until she found kunais and shuriken behind the counter. She warily eyed them, attempting to pluck out the defected ones. The private armory that made their weapons that were paid by the village was usually better, but the ones on the shelf looked excellent. There was a bigger selection as well. All of the weapons were on a neat, carved-oak shelf that stood out among the dark, lustrous metal. The top shelf held the most expensive and impressive kunai and shuriken. There were intricate vine-patterns on the edges. The metal had been made with much effort. It showed with the dangerously glinting edges, intricately wrapped handles, and the delicate finger holes. As she looked further down the shelf the weapons became less decorative but the quality never changed. These were excellent weapons to use. If she didn't lie, these were the best she ever saw in her life.

"What may I—"

Sakura frowned lightly. She only came here once when Sasuke was still in the village and he brought a peculiar sword here. She had curiously followed him, but now she'd never be able to follow him ever again.

"Sakura," the familiar voice questioned. Sakura snapped out of her thoughts and looked up to the worker. Her eyes widened in surprise and slight horror. Spring green met aquamarine. The worker smiled as her long bangs brushed pass her shoulder.

"Well, hello to you, too." Ino remarked, friendly smile intact. Sakura didn't react to the playful gesture.

"Didn't know you took up blacksmithing, Ino." Sakura stated as she tried to peer over the taller girl, trying to find the weaponry she desired. Ino took a step back to aid Sakura and her attempt.

"I like to try new things." Ino hummed as she stared at Sakura's intent gaze at the kunais. "You here to buy more supplies for a mission? I can say that the new rule is pretty horrible, because we're the ones risking our lives. They should tax the residence a little more. The rate isn't bad and—"

"I don't really care about it. I just need more stuff." Sakura rudely interrupted. Ino frowned and took the hint to remain quiet. However, Sakura knew it was impossible.

"So, how's your counseling going, Sakura?" Ino asked with friendly concern. Sakura immediately closed her eyes in frustration. _What is with people and giving me pity on my current condition? I'm perfectly fine!_

"Oh, ok." Ino concluded, leaning against the dirty counter with a huff. Sakura chose to just ignore her obvious pouting expression. She continued to examine the selection as the sound of metal ringing drifted through her ears.

"Figure anything out yet?" Ino asked as she looked upon the shelf, trying to help Sakura decide. She smiled as she spotted a particular kunai and took it off the shelf, handing it to Sakura for closer inspection. Sakura glanced up at Ino, quietly thanking her and taking the weapon from her gloved hands. Sakura placed a single, curious finger on the kunai's smooth side and glided it across. _It's perfectly smooth with no bumps or depressions. _Sakura moved it around to eye the tip. Ino watched her movements closely as Sakura inquisitively poked the point, quickly drawing blood from the prick. _Beautifully sharp._ She moved to the handle to grip it. This was meant for close-combat, unlike the smaller version meant for throwing. She squeezed the handle, testing its comfort and ease. She threw it in the air, the kunai spun furiously and dangerously. Ino frowned as Sakura caught it without effort by its handle. _Only one last test…_ Ino's eyes widened as Sakura spun around with surprising speed and threw the kunai at the store's wooden post. It -landed with a deep thud and accuracy between the small loop-hole of a string.

"It's perfect." Sakura stated. Ino scoffed.

"Did you not read the sign on the counter?" Ino lightly grumped as she pointed to an unnoticeable sign. Sakura looked at it.

**DO NOT TEST THE WEAPONS! **

This time it was Sakura's turn to scoff. "Well, I had to see if it'd even be good in combat."

Ino frowned, "that's not even the right kunai to throw, unless it was emergency. And we don't allow it because the kunai dulls down. We don't want to sell dull weapons to customers."

"I know that and if they dull down that fast doesn't it make them incompetent?" Sakura mentioned. Ino rolled her eyes.

"Sakura," she spoke in a soft voice without any venom, "you should know from the academy that kunais easily dull, even with the first few uses."

Sakura glared at Ino. She knew that, she was just testing her. She looked away as she walked over to the post and ripping the kunai away from it.

"I will buy ten of these, twenty of your smaller, and ten shuriken." Sakura grumbled. "And, since you'd get mad if I don't, I'll buy the one I used."

Ino smiled and walked over to a different cupboard that was closed. "What number is that kunai?"

Sakura blinked before looking at the price tag. "Uh, it's number forty-two?"

Ino nodded and skimmed through the stock. She voiced a sound of recognition when she found the correct kunai. She delicately plucked the kunai out and placed them in a neat pile on the table. _She's going too slowly._

"They aren't flower arrangements, Ino. Hurry up." Sakura begged. Ino's smile widened as she hummed a tune.

"If I do that some others might fall and amputate my toes." She joked. Sakura eyed the cupboard. Ino snorted.

"You'd like that wouldn't you?" She asked with a more serious tone. Sakura didn't respond.

"Of course you would, why did I even ask?" Ino mumbled more to herself than her friend. She quickly finished retrieving the large kunai before walking over to a different cupboard.

"Which smaller ones did you want?" She questioned while examining the stock. Sakura shrugged.

"Give me what you think you'd like." Sakura grumbled. Ino smiled.

"Size six?" Ino asked. Sakura flinched and raised an eyebrow.

"Ino, that's for kids." Sakura deadpanned with frown. Ino giggled.

"Exactly."

"What? What are you trying to say?" Sakura irritably asked.

"I'm just mentioning that you're acting like a kid, Sakura." Ino stated without humor. Sakura flinched at the sudden switch in moods. What? When did she act like a kid? She never—

"You always hide your emotions in and out of your job. Just like a kid when a mom scolds her child for pouting then he interrupts saying he isn't."

Sakura stared at Ino's back with widened eyes. The leather apron was extravagantly tied in the back and only covered her mid-back and lower. Her upper-back wasn't covered, revealing the sweat lacquered skin. Her shoulder blades slowly moved as Ino moved, unintentionally defining her back even more.

"Just because we don't talk anymore doesn't mean I don't care. I notice you still." Ino motioned as she finally retrieved the smaller kunais and looked at Sakura with a solid frown. "I really wish you noticed stuff like that."

Sakura looked away. _Ino is just messing with you again. Don't fall for it._ Sakura didn't say anything as she stared at an interesting piece of metal work.

Ino sighed as she retrieved the shuriken without a word. The silence calmly reigned over them without an awkward moment. It was the calmness of noticing each other's presence in the same room, acknowledging their individuality and different processes of thinking, and opinions.

"That's going to be fifteen thousand Ryō, but with the shinobi, or kunoichi discount for you," Ino winked, making Sakura flinch, "it'll be seven thousand Ryō."

Sakura brought out her coins and quickly counted.

"I only have five thousand." Sakura murmured in embarrassment. Ino smiled despite the situation.

"I will cover with my employee's discount." Ino assured while waving her hand. Sakura shot her head up.

"You can't! That's too much!" If it was someone else, Sakura might've accepted the offer but it was Ino. And she couldn't accept it.

Ino stuck her tongue out, "Too bad. I already added it in the cashier. You can repay me back sometime."

Sakura frowned and glowered. "Like what?"

It didn't take Ino any longer than one second to come up with a plan. "Ok, I'm going on a three month espionage, bodyguard mission tomorrow and—"

"What?" Sakura deadpanned as her eyes widened. She never heard that news when Shikamaru came by with a broken finger at the hospital. Ino frowned.

"What? It's not that bad. The mission should be easy." Sakura shook her head.

"Isn't that an A-rank mission?" She replied. Ino nodded.

"It is." Sakura raised an eyebrow.

"For Jōnin." Sakura added. Ino slowly nodded.

"Sakura, you've either been sleeping under a rock or you would've noticed I'm aTokubetsu Jōnin** (2)**." Sakura stared at Ino. She had no idea that she had advanced that far in the ranks. Even if she wasn't a complete Jōnin Ino was still in the ranks. Now, Ino made Sakura feel like a total scumbag. She didn't even know her ex-best friend's promotion.

"Anywho, you can repay me by exchanging mail with each other every week. I believe I heard that Lee feels like he isn't getting enough exercise so he started a part time job of being a courier shinobi. I bet he'd be just _enthralled_ to get your letters delivered, _for free_." Ino suggested with a smile. Sakura could only nod in agreement, still surprised at the new information about Ino she learned.

"Good! Now, I will probably not see you in a few months. With that said, I deserve a hug!" Before Sakura could decline, Ino hopped over the counter with ease and brought Sakura into her arms. Sakura's face turned red at the close contact. She hadn't been this close with someone in a long time…a very long time. She didn't respond to the hug but tried to remember how to feel when someone gave hug. It was awkward and strange to her now. As quick as she was hugged it ended with Ino still smiling.

"I'll be looking forward to your letters!" Ino yelled with enthusiasm as Sakura scurried out of the shop with her packaged weapons. _Wait, I don't have her ma_— Sakura noticed on the package was a note with the mailing address. _Oh._

Sakura started heading towards the crowded, usual street of the village until she stopped at the corner that entered it. She looked back to the steam-filled street and the armory. She was still surprised to find Ino there, let alone everything she had said. She was very…different than before. Sakura glanced back down to the mailing address then back to the street.

A warm, soft breeze picked up and sent an unusual shiver up Sakura's spine. _A new wind…_

* * *

Sakura stared at the twilight sky, thinking over the day as her new weapons lied across her bed. She wondered what made Ino so different today. She seemed happy, too happy. It was unnerving that she was so exuberant. _Maybe it's because you can't even enjoy what she has, it's intimidating. _Sakura shut her eyes closed and hugged herself, pulling away from the window and into the corner of her bed. She felt a little isolated at the thought. _What did Ino find to make her so happy?_ But most importantly, why did Ino deserve it over her? Why didn't she get to find happiness? She had the worse of problems. Sakura opened her eyes and pondered some more.

And what was with Ino today? She seemed to know every move she made in advance. If she was going to move her hand towards the doorknob, Ino would already be twisting it open. She knew everything she was doing. Ino was ahead of her in every move. When she tried to push Ino away from being informal and friendly with her, she got after her motives by joking with the kid-sized kunais. Sakura buried her head in her knees. _What was with everyone today? They seem to know everything. _

_Or…maybe they knew it all along and just got the courage to confront you._

Sakura squeezed her eyes shut again. She had forgotten that her inner-self had returned. _Ever since…ever since…_Sakura couldn't bring herself to say it. Her eyes watered at the very thought of it. She hugged her knees tighter and bit her lip. _I won't cry! Dammit! I won't cry! _Sakura shuddered in defeat as the first, lone tear dripped off her face. She watched it with bleary eyes descend to her bedcovers and crash. No one could hear the tear fall but Sakura felt it. She felt the impact sweep over her like an explosion that released all of her tears. Sakura opened her mouth to protest but to only have an agonizing cry leap from her throat. She felt sickened at her pain.

_Good ninjas don't show emotion, Sasuke said._

_I'm not sad. I'm over this. This pain isn't real!_

Naruto said he doesn't like people who lie to themselves.

_This pain is a lie that I'm making. I can't lie to myself! Get over it! It's been a year since—_

Sakura's raw, tortured voice rang out again. It unleashed its fury upon the quiet apartment as the tears cascaded, and her agony swallowed her up in the brink of night. _  
_

**

* * *

**

(**1)Ryō is the currency used into the Naruto world based on an old Japanese coin. Kishimoto gave the exchange rate of 10 yen to a Ryō. The current exchange rate for USD for yen is 1(USD) to 92.4145, roughly 92 yen. So, you can do the rest of the math.**

**(2)Tokubetsu Jōnin are shinobi who are advanced and specialize in a certain skill or more that rank higher than Chūnin. They rank in-between the two ranks of Chūnin and Jōnin. Instead of being an all around excellent ninja, they only specialize in a few skills. **

**A/N: **

**This InoSaku story will be in the Naruto Universe. It will be very angsty, lovey, and probably my newest baby. As for the other stories I have going, I'm happy and sad to say some will get finished in due time just be patient with me. I will promise to people who like reading long stories that this will probably break Me & You's wordcount with ease. I hope you guys will enjoy this as much as I liked writing it. **

**Read and Review, please! It's very appreciated!**


	2. The Party Scene has got the Best of Me

_What am I doing here?_ Sakura stared at the tall, open gates before her. She lightly shivered as she pulled her coat closer to her. Autumn was almost here and it was cold in the mornings now. Sakura stared at the small group of people around her. Lee, Shikamaru, Choji, Hinata, Neji, and Inoichi stood near the gates, staring at the small squad of shinobi passing them. Many of the shinobi were well known. Some even had nicknames enemies called them. They were a fierce bunch heading out to do three month mission. _And then, there's Ino in the tough bunch._ To make things worse, there were only her family and friends here to pardon them off. Sakura didn't want to think too much on the lack of the other party.

The other shinobi stopped and waited outside as Ino turned towards her goodbye party. Sakura shivered again and ducked her head into her coat. _Why did I chose to come and say goodbye to her? Oh, I owe her. _Sakura closely watched Ino go to her father and give him a hug, whispering something assuring to him. She walked over to her other friends and gave strong handshakes to the boys, except with Lee. She was hugged and swept off her feet and shook fiercely. The rest simply exchanged good-lucks. However, when Ino went to Hinata they both smiled eagerly and gave soft, friendly hugs. Ino suspiciously glanced over at Sakura and whispered something to Hinata. It seemed that this morning was filled with whispers. Nobody wanted to disturb the crisp morning and its silence. Sakura looked away from the two, trying to look disinterested but she couldn't help but feel curiosity gnaw at her mind.

Soon Ino was over to her with a friendly smile. Her rosy nose and cheeks seemed to prove that it was cold, but enhanced her happy features. _Why is she so happy?_

"You be a good girl, alright?" Ino requested while lightly tousling Sakura's hair like a dog. Sakura glared at her and swatted her hand away.

"I'm not a dog." Sakura reminded callously. Ino's smile widened.

"I know. But you will be good, right?" Ino asked again with a more serious tone. She eyed Sakura warily with a disciplined finger pointing at her. Sakura scrunched her nose up.

"Sure." Sakura grumbled and looked away. _Ino is being weird again. _

"Don't pout." Ino chided while resting her hand on Sakura's shoulder. She flinched in response and walked out of the touch. Ino's smile dropped almost unnoticeably.

"You're still going to mail me, right?" She asked lightly. The tone of her voice scared Sakura. She briefly closed her eyes. _I can't see it anymore _but she still felt the friendly warmth emitting off her ex-friend. She wanted to swat it away and put up a wall, but Ino was too close right now. Sakura didn't have enough room to hide her raw side from the inquisitor of a blond. She didn't have enough space to build the wall when Ino's arm was hovering over her shoulder.

"Yeah. I have to. I owe you it." Sakura responded. Ino sighed and gave Sakura a light smack on the head.

"Cheer up, kiddo." Ino gave a toothy smile. "You act like life is complete hell and there's nothing good in it, especially when there is. So put a smile on your face!" Ino beamed before sticking her hands in Sakura's mouth and tugging the upper-lips up to form a forced smile. Sakura was stunned in her spot. She was shocked that Ino invaded her personal space just like that! _Does she have no shame?! _Sakura tried to frown but was painfully reminded that there were two fingers keeping her from doing so.

"Ee-Oh."

"Yes?" Ino innocently looked at her slightly shorter friend.

"Gee yo' hingas udda mah muth." Sakura commanded with a glare. Ino smiled and happily removed. Sakura shot up her hand to rub the tender flesh.

"Well, that's a start." Ino hummed before taking a step back and putting her hands behind her back, leaning forward. "I will want to hear all about you, Sakura!"

Sakura studied Ino's weird backing up position and motion, and how she didn't take her eyes off of her. _Ino is definitely strange._

"Ok," Sakura stated. She watched as Ino slowly walked backwards to her group. Then, without hesitation or control, Sakura's hand shot up to her chest and gently waved. Sakura wasn't even aware of it as Ino happy smiled and eagerly waved back.

In the corner of her eye, she swore she caught Hinata smiling at her.

* * *

Sakura scooted the newest recruits of the hospital down the hall to minor-injuries to start the day. She watched them scurry around the corner and listened until they were out of hearing distance. She turned around and sighed.

_At least that's over with._

She walked down the hallway and turned into a familiar hospital room. The door was propped open like usual. It stood out from the rest that were firmly shut to ensure privacy for the patients. However, this particular patient preferred the door wide open. Sakura lightly held her breath and went inside. The white room was filled with the sounds of monitors. They cluttered all around a single, tiny bed. On the bed, neatly tucked under the blankets, injected with too many tubes, laid a frail girl. Sakura purposely took smaller, quieter steps towards the bed. She had placed her notepad on the small table near the door. She watched with soft eyes as the girl's chest breathed up and down. The steady sound of the girl's heartbeat displayed on the monitors and was transmitted into soft, rhythmic beeps.

_It has been 9 weeks since you've been in here._ Sakura slowly took off her safe hospital gloves and placed them on the edge of the girl's bed. The girl shifted as her heartbeat quickened. Her lips formed into a soft, chapped smile as her pale cheeks rose. The bandage wrap around her eyes slightly crinkled.

"Sakura," the girl's hand aimlessly patted around the bed in attempt to search for human contact. Sakura didn't waste a second before sliding her hand across to grasp the girl's hand. Once she had taken hold the girl's lips parted to reveal a delicate, white smile. Her adolescent teeth were near perfect, against the popular belief that children's first teeth were always rotten and bad. Sakura's eyes watched the facial features carefully.

"Hikari." Sakura replied with soft, nurturing eyes. The window's curtains were wide open, allowing all the light the room could soak up. The dust motes danced in the evening's light as the sun slowly descended in the distance. Sakura's gaze slowly scanned the small girl's upper-body, inspecting for any differences or new infections. Hikari squeezed Sakura's larger hand. Sakura brought her gaze back up to the young child's soft face.

"Today," Hikari began with a soft smile. Her clear, high voice rose out of the terrible state she was in. If Sakura could only hear the girl's voice she would've thought that she was a beyond happy and healthy child. Only one of those statements was true.

"I heard academy kids running by and their laughter." Hikari's smile widened as her grip became stronger.

"I listened and they were talking about Iruka-sensei's retirement party next week. There was going to be cake." Her voice sang above her physical downfalls and into the clouds. With full of exuberance and childish ignorance, the voice resembled a silenced one from long ago back in Sakura's academy days. She remembered the same happy tone.

_Sakura-Chan!_

"But then one of the new nurses closed the window and I couldn't hear anymore." Her voice decreased into a low, dull sound as her hand lightened its grip. Sakura gave a reassuring squeeze.

"I'll tell the nurses not to bother your room unless emergencies." Sakura lightly frowned and brushed the girl's blond hair out of her face. Hikari leaned into the touch. Sakura smiled and petted the girl's hair. She continued to do this until the beeping on the monitor's slowed to a steady pace, signifying the girl was near slumber. Sakura hesitantly removed her hand from Hikari's head. The small girl sleepily rustled in her bed.

"Sakura?" She whispered on her evened breath. Her smile slowly faltering into a sleep-filled line.

"Yes, Hikari?" Sakura smiled while reaching out to quietly slide a chair over. Hikari shifted again, her smile brightened up again.

"Tell me another story of you and the places you you've been." She breathed as her words got quieter and the smile began to disappear again. Her head was slowly resting into the pillow. Sakura sat down in the padded chair near the bed.

"Ok, what do you want to hear about now?" Sakura asked while taking hold of the girl's hand. The girl woke up a little more and shuffled about.

"More about your adventures with Sasuke and Naruto. And seeing places…and having fun…cats." Hikari drifted. Sakura stroked the smaller girl's hand.

"I will tell you about the Land of the Waves and the ocean." Sakura suggested. Hikari only nodded as she settled into sleep.

"We had a cabin near the stream that led to the ocean." Sakura began as her eyes hazed over and her smile brightened. Her cheeks became flushed with life and fond memories. Time seemed to fall between her fingers like grain of sand as she told her story. She emphasized Naruto's loudmouth and Sasuke's sleek quietness. Her eyes glazed over as she almost spilled out details about the battle, let alone mention it. She shut her mouth before opening it, telling Hikari about the ocean and how beautiful it was. Sakura didn't feel comfortable telling the ex-academy student about the violence and death toll of battles and missions. She didn't want to think about the close calls. Sakura didn't even want to mention the refined kunais she bought that are intentioned to slice open skin with ease. No, she'd never tell Hikari this. Not for her sake but Sakura's.

_Life is too precious to be taken away because of disagreements._ Sakura's eyes lightly watered before she clamped down her lids and hid the tears. Hikari had long been asleep. Sakura sighed. Her throat was raw and used up from the talking. Her story lasted longer than last time and more than Sakura usually intended. She looked back outside to see that the sun was no longer there in the sky. It was gone. It was up and now it wasn't there anymore. Sakura glanced down. It quickly ran away from Sakura's trained eye.

Sakura stood up and exited the room, picking up her clipboard on the way. She kept Hikari's door open because she would've wanted that. The girl couldn't see anymore. All she could do was hear, feel, and talk. Sakura didn't want to restrict the girl. Unlike the other children, she couldn't see and caused her to be neglected from most games. Sakura didn't want her to be bored inside her hospital room. She wanted the girl to be free as possible. She left the door open so the girl could feel like she was outside even if she couldn't see it. She wanted Hikari to feel the autumn breeze greet her skin and the sound of footsteps. Sakura wanted Hikari to be able to lift her soul from her body with that beautiful, hopeful voice and venture into unknown territory. Sakura wanted her to live and have hope.

_One day I'm going to be Hokage!_

* * *

Sakura walked home in the freezing cold. She hugged herself and shivered. _Why didn't I bring a coat? _She huffed in defeat as her white breath drifted in the air.

She continued to walk, taking a different but faster route to her house. She never used it because she never wanted to be home. _Well, my home now_. She reminded herself that she moved out of her parent's house on year ago. She wished she didn't know and kept forgetting that she had left her old home. Now…she was stuck in a house, too big for one person. Alone inside the brooding house with its looming walls and low, suffocating ceiling.

Sakura was brought out of her thoughts as the loud thumping sound of music hit her ears. She wondered where it was coming from. Sakura sped up her pace. With each step forward the music became louder. She continued to speed up until she was into a jog. The music was booming in her ears now as she neared a corner. _It has to be around there_.

As she neared the corner she slowed down and casually walked around it. Her gaze met large, cheesy neon lights and a crowd of suggestively dressed people. She frowned.

_Another club? _She stated while narrowing her eyes and furrowing her brows. She experimentally sniffed the air. _Of course._ Like usual, it reeked of cheap beer and perfume. She scanned the crowd and noticed the eyes of everyone staring at her. She didn't care for them and raised her stare back at the club.

Clubs were blemishes in Konoha's image. They only seemingly tried to prove that shinobi were alcoholics who couldn't hold their emotions. However, Sakura never saw a single shinobi enter the cesspools called bars just to get drunk. She has seen plenty of mixer nights and such, but not with the intended goal to get wasted. Shinobi held higher standards than that. _I'd be damned to go to one of these places. _

But luck was on Sakura's side. Konoha had hardly any tolerance for alcoholic drinks, let alone filthy places like clubs. However, Tsunade permitted clubs and bars after a couple of years in her position. It came with a cost, though. The tax to keep a club on the village's land was outrageous and almost impossible. Once a club opened there was always a four week interval until it closed. Sakura could easily say that she saw more than ten clubs open and fail. She heard even more complete that process. Sakura smiled. _In a couple of weeks this club will be closed._ The only conclusion Sakura could form on why clubs wanted to open on such expensive rates would be the common, cliché saying that shinobi were alcoholics. The clubs always believed that shinobi would flock to polish off bottle after bottle of beer to release them from the stressful, traumatizing life of a shinobi. The clubs gloated that they were geniuses to open up clubs and just know they were going to be millionaire, and each time they made excuses that they found a _better_ place to open a club when they had to close.

_Clubs are a waste of time and money. A real shinobi would never venture into one unless required for a mission. Drinking isn't any better. _

She looked away from the eyesore and continued on her way. However, the eyes of the clubbers wished to draw her back to the scene.

Sakura briskly walked to her house. Her fingers were becoming icy. She stared up at the lone, yellow moon. She ripped her gaze from it to notice her house, sitting on the isolated corner. Sakura would soon be in there, alone with only the quiet walls, and nothing to save her from her thoughts and self. Sakura looked away from the house.

_I'll be fine tonight. _

_I hate people who lie to themselves._

Shinobi who wake in their own pity are trash. 

_Sadness and hate have made me powerful. I will avenge my clan!_

_Sasuke! NARUTO!_

Sakura, we can do this together as a team…Team 7.

**...**

_I'm so alone. _

* * *

**A/N:**

Ok, I have to put this out there. Lots and lots of people are starting to make Sakura an alcoholic. I can see their view on that...but personally I seriously CANNOT see her becoming that. I don't even think she will droop that low to get rid of some emotional pain. Tsunade did because she hardly has any shame. Sakura has plenty of it. Another one is that in mostly every InoSaku story they go clubbing. Reason why? I have no clue except to get them into skimpy clothing, wear make-up, grind against each other, and drink booze to have drunken sex later that's either used to A) Progress feelings B) Cause tension once they find out they were with 1) A girl 2) Rival 3) had sex OR C) Just because they wanted a lemon.

Besides the ranting ha-ha, I will say that I'm glad to post so fast. I hope you enjoyed reading it.

Read and Review!

P.S: I'm not pointing fingers. It's just MY -personal- pet peeve. I just think Sakura and Ino have plenty of decency to not venture into a club and wear skimpy clothing that only promote sex. They are prideful girls that would probably want to differ from an 'easy-girl'. The alcoholic thing can be logical in a sense but I just find it rather...degrading of Sakura and making her weak willed. Evidence to show she isn't: She like superman punched Ino out of her when she tried to use Mind Control.


	3. And She will be Loved

___A large, calloused hand gripped Sakura's arm, gentle. His dark, brooding eyes softened at the sight of her. His firm line curved into a light, almost innocent smile. His muscles were tense as the blood gushed from his fatal wounds. His hair clung to his sweaty face. His breathing was ragged and smelled like death, the stench of blood, dirt, and faint hint of tomatoes._

_"Sakura," his cracked, dry lips moved slowly, sounding out every syllable in her name with relative ease despite his condition. The parched smile was still intact._

"Save me." He pleaded with his final breathes. He asked so kindly, unlike the usual him. Her eyes stared into his opaque ones.

"My clan must be revived…only you." He carefully played with the words that would unfreeze her heart. She felt it throb so passionately that it could've burst. How she hated how he was now, but he admitted he needed her. That's all she could ever want.

_A kunai quickly lodged into his throat as her vision was covered with an arm._

"Naruto!" Tears erupted from her eyes as the only thing she wanted was ripped from this world. She only loved him…she only loved him…and he was gone, forever. She could have saved him. He was gone. Naruto held her close, protecting her from the sight he had made as his tears fell as well.

"Sakura," a cracked, feeble voice whispered. She looked down to the hand that clutched her arm for dear life. It was bandaged and led up to an unfamiliar face. The young shinobi smiled at her.

"You saved my life," he thanked with his last strength before going unconscious. The medical team around her in the room lightly clapped for her accomplishment. She had forgotten where she was or what she was doing until now. She nodded politely and exited the room.

Today, she had cured two diseases, saved five lives, worked one miracle, and had more to go. Sakura was a well-known name in Konoha, maybe too famous. It was a name of a single woman who annually saves hundreds of lives from the brink of death. The sole name is a nuisance to assassins, a saint to peasants, and savior to shinobi. She had grown into a title which she felt no obligation to keep up. It was title randomly given to her, one that just popped up in the middle of time without warning.

Kids liked to go to the hospital and point at her, screaming her title. She would ignore them. The title wasn't her name but a false person. The name she was given without permission was a different person than herself.

"Amaterasu! Amaterasu!"(1) The kids cried out when she walked by. Sakura didn't understand how that name fitted her. It was the polar opposite with how she felt. Sakura continued down the hospital corridor until she stopped by the familiar room of forty-two. She looked over to see Hikari sitting up, talking to a few academy students and Iruka. She felt a warm smiled cross her lips. As quickly as it came it was gone when she felt a tug at her pant leg. She looked down to see a young, pudgy student.

"Amaterasu-sama, you have a candy? You have candy?" He eagerly asked with impatient hands. Sakura frowned and stared at the kid. He didn't look like he needed anything sweet. However, her actions betrayed her as her hand dug into her doctor's coat pocket and fished out a small, red lollipop. The kid snatched it from her hand with a heartwarming smile.

"Thank-you, Amaterasu!" He squealed and ran back into the room, pointing at Sakura while saying he was given candy from someone so famous. Before they could look, she disappeared.

* * *

The church's bells rang nearby as Sakura descended the stairs of the Hokage's tower. She stared at the setting sun in the distance. Her long hair swept by the early autumn breeze. She had grown it long ever since a year ago, or somewhere around there. She carelessly allowed it to grow without caring for split ends. She had forgotten how burdensome it was to have long hair, but now she didn't really care. Ironically, it had not a single split end and was rather silky. It reached her mid-back. _Surprised Ino didn't say anything about it_, Sakura lightly commented.

Her green eyes darted down at the sound of fast approaching footsteps. Below her further down the stairs was the guy from the hospital. He was already running about again. _So enthusiastic and sort of stupid_, Sakura stopped to get a better look at the man. _He should be in bed resting or his wounds might open up again. _

"Why are you moving around? You still need at least three days of bed rest to fully recover. Your wounds may open again." Sakura examined him further. He was wearing his shinobi uniform, concealing his bandages. The man stopped, eyes widened as his mouth opened and closed. He soon gave her a bright, toothy smile before bowing.

"My apologizes," he courteously responded. He bounced back up, somewhat worrying Sakura that he'd open his wounds again.

"You need to be more careful." Sakura frowned and chided. "Especially with just walking up stairs, the gashes in your legs will open up. You don't want to be in the hospital again, do you?"

The man was taken for surprise again before blushing. He played with his fingers as he looked up at Sakura.

"The rumors are right. You're just like Amaterasu. You care for everyone and you're very compassionate with your work as a doctor. You're also _very_, **_very_** beautiful." He replied sheepishly with a warm smile. Sakura's eyes widened as she felt her feet freeze to the ground. A large gust of autumn air swept her up again. She stared at the man below her. _Why is he saying this? He's getting nothing out of it. _Sakura's eyes darted away from his intent gaze. She didn't like how she was the center of attention. She scratched her cheek where a hidden blush formed.

"What are you doing here anyways?" She asked the man. It irritated her that she didn't know him enough so she could use his name to properly brush him off. She didn't remember her patient's names. There were just too many to deal with.

"Oh, I was coming here to tell the Hokage I'm still well for my mission in a month." He cheered with a strong smile. Sakura nodded.

"Well, you won't be if you over-do yourself and keep opening your wounds." Sakura insisted and crossed her arms. The guy just smiled and saluted.

"Anything for Amaterasu!" He chimed before jogging up the stairs, going pass Sakura. "Plus, what can a few, little—ITA!"

* * *

Sakura carefully slid the needle into the skin and out of it. Kenji had to close his eyes to protect his 'innocence'. She shook her head again. She knew he would overdo his healing wounds. She dabbed some of the oozed blood that came from the wound with a wet cloth. Kenji gripped the hospital bed tighter. She rolled her eyes.

"Amaterasu! Can't you be more kind and gentle?" He loudly whined. Sakura finished the stitches and wiped her work down with alcohol to prevent infection. She walked over to the nearby disposal and took off her gloves.

"You're finished." Sakura ended before taking her clipboard and writing down her activity. She glanced up at the man.

"Tell me your full name." She asked and readied her pen. Kenji examined his wounds.

"Uh, Yamamoto Kenji." He mumbled as he curiously poked at the stitches. Sakura frowned and lightly swatted his hand away.

"I don't want to redo your stitches, again, Yamamoto." She warned before handing him the clipboard.

"Sign your name on that line right there along with phone number and address." She told him before going over to the cabinet. She grabbed out a spare bottle and fished out the alcohol. She didn't want his wounds to get infected if he was going to run about. Sakura filled the bottle with some alcohol and grabbed a sticky label. She quickly wrote 'alcohol' on it and 'for wounds'.

"Why do I need to put my number and address?" Kenji asked with flirtatious interest after he signed. Sakura glanced over at him as she put little cotton swabs in a Ziploc bag. He was a good-looking guy. Green eyes with dark brown hair and a tan. She wouldn't be surprised if he was trailed after by lots of girls. However, he probably didn't let them dangle too long with that flirty attitude. Sakura took the clipboard away from him and flipped the page to the doctor's discretion in the back. She began to hastily sign the note.

"If you read what you signed, it was a disclaimer that if you got infected or if the stitching wasn't good enough and the wound opened up again that you wouldn't be able to sue the hospital. And, if it got bad enough, and you died somehow because of that, we'd know where the body came from and could contact your family and bring the body to the house." Sakura informed quickly and she tore off the doctor's note and handed it to the stunned man.

"Any further questions?" She asked as he read the note. He frowned and looked back up.

"This is an excuse to keep me in bed for four days? I thought I was only supposed to be in for three?" He whined. Sakura crossed her arms.

"It seemed like you didn't listen enough the first time. Give this to your squad leader and go straight back home and sleep off the wounds. I'm sure you can have fun while taking a break." She suggested. "Just make sure you give it to your squad leader."

Kenji scratched the back of his head as he stared at the note, "but I am the squad leader."

Sakura examined him again. He was handsome but she didn't expect him to be a quality shinobi. "Well then, excuse yourself from your team and go rest. You need it unless you want unsightly scars to form all over your body and wounds to be infected."

Kenji shrugged, "I can have you remove the scars and renew my skin. Isn't that a new discovery of being a medic shinobi?"

Sakura frowned. "You're dancing around the subject and yes it is. However, it costs a lot due to how new it is and not a lot of medics have perfected it. Other than that you need to rest. No excuses."

Kenji opened his mouth to protest but Sakura scolded him further. Kenji sighed in defeat before a brilliant idea came to his head. A witty smile crawled onto his lips.

"If I don't does that mean you'll have to come over and take care of me?" He asked with wide eyes and an anxious smile. His fists were practically going up and down in excitement at the thought. He's an overgrown child, Sakura stated as a small vein of annoyance appeared on her forehead.

"I will send an inexperience medic to take care of you." Sakura deadpanned. Kenji's wide eyes turned from hopeful to horror.

"But they don't know how to give chakra right and it burns like hell!" He refused. Sakura lightly smiled, only pushing Kenji further.

"YOU KNEW THAT! Oh! Oh! Oh! OH NO! Don't do that to me, Amaterasu!" He begged and flailed his arms in every direction to prove his disapproval. Sakura's smiled widened a little more. Just a little.

"Amaterasu, you're so mean!" Kenji cried out. Sakura frowned. He kept calling her that nickname she was randomly given. Sakura didn't know why that name was given to her or why. It was not relevant to her career let alone what she did. She wasn't the light in the world or tender to everyone. She was almost the opposite. Sakura threw small, filled container and cotton swab bag.

"Why do you call me that name?" She asked. Her curiosity was getting to her.

Kenji blinked. "Is this the first time you were called it?"

"No. I get called it too many times."

"Oh, if you want I won't call you it. It's just---"

"Can you please tell me why you call me that?"

Kenji frowned. "Well, lots of people call you it…you help save many lives. You're the light that everyone looks at in their times of need. You dedicate to everyone, and…it's just hard to describe. You have a glow to you when you're saving lives and helping around. You just seem so nice to your patients."

Sakura frowned. "Do I really? I think you're exaggerating. I don't recall ever being friendly to my patients."

Kenji flinched and looked away, scratching the back of his head. "Well you still have that glow."

Sakura scrunched up her nose. "Is it because I have bright, pink hair?"

The man nervously laughed. "Sort of."

Sakura sighed. She was given that name because she was bright looking. "Well, the nickname doesn't fit me."

Kenji jumped to his feet, making Sakura nervous he was going to open his wounds _again_.

"No, no! I swear the name fits you! It's just hard to explain! You'll see! I will show you some day!" Kenji promised. "It's a promise!"

Sakura looked away from him._ It's a promise. _Those words still stung her like a needle. Sakura nodded him off before walking towards the door.

"Let's go. I have things to do." Sakura lied. She just wanted to be alone with herself. She didn't exactly want to go make promises with a stranger.

"Ok, well, I guess I'll see you some other time then, Sakura." Kenji replied with a warm grin. She flinched when she looked at him. His strong facial features softened into a considerate, almost loving expression. It scared Sakura. Her throat felt a little constricted.

"I suppose we will meet again." Sakura forced before scurrying away from the frightening man. She didn't need to see that type of look. She had no right to have that given to her. It was only one encounter…

* * *

Sakura sat at her work table at her house. She had one room in her house that she spent most of her time in and this was that room, her study. Around the room were bookcases crammed with books of all sizes and colors, but each relevant with the study of the medical career. Each book varied from useful herbs, medical entries, surgeries, human anatomy, chakra points, and such.

Above Sakura was a shelf filled with her own medical journals that were chalk full of medical information. She wrote down each new experience she achieved on the operating table or grinding herbs up. She even put down procedures she believed she perfected for others to use in the future. She had nineteen medical journals in all. She would need a new shelf after she was finished with this one.

Sakura wrote down the last sentence that concluded her surgeries she did today. She was nearing the end of her journal which would be used to summarize the information given within the diary. Sakura had hoped one day she would be able to publish these journals and have another source of income and shine light on the medical shinobi's life, encouraging others to join and help. Sakura sighed and closed the book, putting it to the side of her table. She pushed her chair out and was about to turn off her lamp but accidently knocked over her neglected, blank envelopes. Sakura frowned. She should just throw these out. She never mailed a letter and never intended to anytime soon. Only time she was required was at the hospital and all the supplies were given. She sighed and put the letters off to the side, out of the way. She turned off her lamp and exited the study.

Sakura was tired. It was two AM and she needed sleep. She didn't have to go to the hospital tomorrow but she wanted to. She liked to get things done and put more in her medical journal. She shambled to her bedroom without a thought on her mind. It was going to be a good night. She was too tired to think about anything.

____

* * *

**1. Amaterasu is the sun goddess in Japanese mythology. She was described as a warm, tender, and compassionate goddess to the people who worshipped her. Without her, there would be no light in the world.  
**

**A/N:  
Late update. I'm sorry. I've been sick these last few days where I'm dizzy and keep almost falling out of my computer chair. So my keyboard is like...toast when I try to hold onto it and try to steady myself. Other than that, just getting some more dimensions on Sakura. Now, there will be future InoSaku stuff. Please be patient with me. And sorry if the document is all screwed up. Fanfiction won't let me take italics off without ruining the whole story. Pain in the ass much?**

**Read and Review, please!  
**


	4. Tombstone of My Reason

Sakura's phone was ringing again. She stared at the phone on the end-table near her white couch. She watched it flicker, the caller's ID was not familiar but she knew who it was. There had been only one person who has been calling her house for two weeks straight. She idly humored herself until the last ring. She stretched her body over towards the phone and hesitated before answering it.

"Hello, Haruno Sakura's residence." She formally answered. Despite knowing the caller and that they knew who they were calling she still wanted to be cold to him.

"Sakura! I think I'm growing a sore on my back! It's all itchy but I can't see it! Help me!" Kenji whined. Sakura rolled her eyes.

"Have you been taking showers?"

"No…it stings when I do." He said while referring to his still healing wounds. They managed to keep reopening, even if Sakura had to keep a closer eye on him. He was so reckless that Sakura managed to send Hinode, Shizune's son, to watch over him after his academy hours. Kenji was also popular with the kids as he was with the ladies. Both of them flocked all over him to see how he was and to hear his big stories on how he saved the mission.

"Well, that's your fault for not dealing with the pain and just doing it. You're probably developing rashes from not taking showers. I would also advise you take them or your team will suffer from the body odor." Sakura crinkled up her nose. There were only two people she knew who could go that long without bathing, Naruto and Lee. Now it was Kenji, Naruto, and Lee.

"But it hurts, Sakura! Did you not hear me earlier?!" He shrieked like a panicking girl. Sakura smiled at his childishness. "Can you give me pain pills?"

Sakura audibly scoffed. "No, that's not worth it. You know that. Plus, they're highly addicting and your _wounds_ aren't that severe. Go to the local pharmacy and get something for the rashes if you so refuse taking a shower."

Kenji sighed, "You're so cruel Amaterasu."

Sakura rolled her eyes again. "Is that all you called me for?" She asked and stretched. She contently sighed when her back popped as she lazily scratched her leg with her foot. It was a Sunday, a day which she couldn't go to the hospital. She was forced by Tsunade to keep at home and deal with her emotions instead of burying them under work.

"Of course not! I need your help. Come by my place!" Kenji quickly intervened as a crash was heard in the background.

"Shitocky-mushrooms!" Kenji yelled, refraining from cussing. Reason why? Sakura didn't know. Maybe it was by habit from hanging around the kids too much.

"Gotta go!" Before Sakura could say she wanted to stay home he hung up, leaving Sakura to her curiosity on why she had to go over there. She listened to the dull dial-tone before hanging up and staring at the phone again.

_Should I go? _Sakura peered at the clock. It was only eleven o' clock, almost noon. She had nothing to do. She already wrote down everything she had experienced down in her journal. Sakura shook her head. She'd just stay home. She didn't feel like going out today. She curiously glanced out the window. It was a beautiful early autumn afternoon. She sighed and leaned back into the couch, staring up at the ceiling.

Her home was a place where she was alone to her thoughts and mind. She could freely explore and overcome her emotional conflicts and insights here without disruption. She could peer through her memories and choose which one, like a crisp paged-book, she wanted to view and spend hours on it. She could do anything in her house that she could imagine. However, her house was also her torture. A place where her thoughts and imagination ran wild with her fears, somewhere that no one could save her. Because she was perfectly alone without distractions or people to pull her out of the tar pit she fell in.

The white swirls on her ceiling continued endlessly. Just like the misery that she was capable of manifesting with a few single thoughts. She closed her eyes.

Without a warning Sakura hopped up from her seat and walked to the door, slipped on her shoes, and walked out the door.

* * *

Sakura stood at the front door of Kenji's impressive house. It had a front garden with a cobblestone walk path. The design of the lot was easily distinguished as a Western style the foreigners brought with them. There weren't any Koi ponds, Sakura trees, or grand archways. No, those were replaced with rose bushes, hedges, and delicately placed stones.

She looked at the button near the door. She only saw a few doorbells in her entire life. She pressed the button and heard the calling bell. Sakura brushed her pant legs and straightened her stance. She waited for the door to open, but it didn't.

A tattered and smudgy Kenji appeared from over the edge, peering from behind the corner.

"Sakura! Please come over! I have to ask you about human anatomy!" He beckoned before disappearing again. Sakura furrowed her brows and frowned. How was she supposed to get over there when there was a hedge blocking every route?

"Jump over the edge!" She heard his distant voice. She shook her head. Sakura huffed and cautiously and awkwardly maneuvered over the hedge, leaving only one indent in the bush from her foot slipping. Sakura quickly jogged from the scene and around the corner. She noticed a small shack with Kenji waiting at the door.

"Hurry up, slowpoke!" He hollered with a boisterous smile. Sakura lightly glared at him and strolled over to the place, making sure to be extra slow for him. Kenji rolled his eyes in return before scooting her inside the shack. Sakura quickly found out what the crash was on the phone. Paint was splattered everywhere on the cement ground, decorating it with an unsightly pattern. The walls had spots and smudges of paint as well. She wondered if Kenji intentionally did this. However the mop and mess in the corner told her that he just had an accident. Sakura's eyes widened before going forward to the sole canvas in the room. On the easel was a grand, detailed painting of a man facing her while arching his toned body against a dark background. The thing that caught Sakura's attention was that the man's carcass was showing with blood splatters. She stared at the morbid painting. The area where the innards were supposed to be was completely white, waiting for a trained eye of the body to fill in. It clicked in Sakura's head.

"You need me to help you how the inside of a human looks like?" Sakura asked. She was somewhat taken back that Kenji could paint so beautifully. She glanced at the art piece again. The tanned body worked greatly with the sanguine fluid. The dark background contrasted the two colors. She wasn't an art expert but it was worthy of being in a gallery.

Kenji sheepishly scratched the back of neck. "Yeah."

Sakura just stared at him. Unsure what to say to him, she was still soaking up the fact that he could paint so…gorgeously.

"Ok, ok, I know my painting looks like it's from an insane, mass-killer dude but I swear that it just came out. I was just feeling frustrated and a little love sick and though HEY let's—"

"Well, right here," Sakura pointed out near the ribcage, "it should be a little lighter so it could show the organs better. Well, that's if they're going to be spilling out."

Kenji looked at his piece of work again, examining the area where Sakura pointed at. He nodded. "I can adjust the lighting a little so it could fit. I think that would look quite better."

He walked over, brushing was Sakura with a paintbrush and began to smudge and color over with a light color. He took a few minutes adjusting before stepping back and smiling.

"Yes that would work." Kenji triumphantly stated while putting his hands on his hips. "Thanks Sakura!"

Sakura smiled. "No problem."

Kenji's face went into shock as a blush appeared across his cheeks. He dropped the brush and bit his lip.

"You smiled finally." He pointed out. Sakura's facial expression quickly soured.

"Oh."

"Well, it isn't a bad thing…I-I-I just thought I'd say that…cause, you know, you like, erm, don't smile too muc- too often." He fumbled. Sakura frowned deeper.

"Is it a bad thing?" She asked, her eyes narrowing. Kenji looked away from her.

"Yes it is because you look really beautiful with a smile." He deadpanned. Sakura looked away from him. She wasn't sure what to say to his comment. Her usual reactions to the rare occasions where people told her she smiled repelled them. Kenji was definitely different from the others. He was determined and brushed off her cold demeanor or was too thickheaded to see it. She stared at her feet. His personality was so familiar to her.

"I'm trying to go for a rugged cut look." Kenji told while going back to his painting and looking at the man's opened stomach. Sakura eyed it.

"Haven't you already seen what a bad cut looks like?" Sakura asked. Kenji froze and she could see the hair almost bristle. She watched him closely. She had taken a few psychology classes in the past and these were clear signs of disturbance. Even without the classes people knew he was taken back.

"Yes but I don't stare at the details. It's too much for me." Kenji stated as he brought a clean brush to his painting and lightly traced the air around it. He intently examined all the details.

"It's bad enough to just kill someone than watch their wounds open and they slowly die." He cringed as his eyes narrowed and his hand shook. "People don't deserve to die." His voice was burdened with emotions as he glared into his painting.

Sakura looked away from him, ashamed that she asked in the first place.

_I'm going to be Hokage, Sakura-Chan!_

People who don't help their friends are lower than trash!

Sasuke is my friend! I won't let him sink into darkness!

I have to kill Sasuke.

No matter how much he did…he had to…Sakura fought back the thoughts as she closed her eyes, leaning against the wall for support.

"So would it be like tattered paper or would it be some type of mess?" Kenji quietly asked with his back to her.

Sakura opened her eyes, "Oh…the cut would look ragged but not like tattered paper unless they were intentional for that design. The flesh underneath would most likely be in uneven proportions like if you carelessly chopped meat." Sakura walked forward and pointed to the picture, touching and savoring the feeling of paint on her finger. It felt cool and plastic. Kenji looked at something between them. She glanced where he stared at and saw nothing. He averted his gaze and began to paint, an almost solid frown on his face. Sakura studied it. She wasn't able to identify the emotion that caused it. It made her feel uncomfortable to not know what he was thinking after a rough conversation. She wouldn't be able to bare the uncomfortable silence with him. She was too used to his happy personality.

"Kenji," she muttered. He looked like he was snapped out of a trance as he looked down at her.

"Whatsup?" He asked with some concern, expecting something serious. Sakura opened her mouth and about closed it. She lightly shook her head. She had to say something or the silence would continue.

"Smile." She felt her cheeks lift and the corners of her mouth twitch into a forgotten position. In the corners of her eyes Sakura could see her cheeks. She felt the damp air and subtle taste of paint hit her teeth and mouth. The cool air left her mouth a little dry. Kenji eyes widened a little before his face broke into a normal, big grin.

"Ok." He beamed as he lightly giggled and began to apply crimson and baby pink to the canvas.

Sakura guided him through the rest of bodily details that her doctor's eye could point out. Kenji would ask for the texture of the particular part, especially the organs. She would give similar shapes and help trace it out on the canvas with him. Before Sakura knew it, she was smiling a little more and more as her fingers got dirtier with paint. She could hardly notice the time as it slipped between her and the canvas. It almost felt like she was painting instead of Kenji. She experienced a feeling of devotion and protectiveness over the artwork like every artist and their masterpiece. She loved every hue of red and peach, the smallest line of muscle, the firm, puckered lips of the agonized man. She had found comfort within the paints and vacancy of the canvas. She had found something she could lose herself in.

"Sakura." Kenji called out as they sat back and looked at the artwork. He frowned and frantically waved his hand in front of her eyes while jumping up and down.

"SAKURA-CHAN!"

"Huh?" Sakura looked over at him with wide eyes. Kenji smiled.

"We did a good job! You know, as a tag team, a duo, partners in crime, super tag-team buddies on this painting! We should do it more often!" Kenji suggested while flailing around in excitement. Sakura shook her head. She was still modest and felt that she didn't want to take up his time of day. She wasn't sure why she started feeling like this but she did now. She felt a little defensive too. _As if I need to feel that way, he's not bothering me._

"I don't know." Sakura stated. She truly felt that way. Unsure. She looked at the finished painting and all its glory. She really liked helping. It was…thought depriving.

"Please! I won't try to take much of your time up! I just think we can do a lot in our spare time with these paints!" Kenji begged as he got on his knees and tugged at Sakura's shirt.

"Oh, please, please, please!" He cried out and banged his head off of her side. Sakura scolded him and smacked his head.

"Ow! Sakura-Chan!" Sakura froze upon realizing what he uttered.

_Blue eyes stared into hers before squinting as a big, toothy grin appeared on his face. His hands unconsciously went behind his head and hugged his neck. He leaned back a little._

"Sakura-Chan! Want to go eat ramen?"

"I have to go." Sakura mumbled and left without further warning. Kenji was left alone in his make-shift studio, worried if he said something wrong. Sakura jogged away and jumped over the hedge with ease. She stopped when she entered the street. She bit her lip as her hands shook. She felt hit teeth grind as her nose crinkled. Her eyes stared at the concrete below her as everything got cold.

"Naruto," she gritted as the final shudder overcame her body. She grabbed at her pant legs and clenched them for dear life. She felt her jaw grow sore from the searing pressure. A few teardrops fell from her eyes as she held back her emotions. It felt like a valve was turned and all her emotions that were suppressed flooded forward. The smallest provocation or mention of her teammates sent her emotions high.

"Why did you leave me," she wasn't used of being alone. After a year or so of living alone and after their departure she would've thought she'd be used to it. But she wasn't. Her body was exposed enough to it. She couldn't stand it. The thought and knowing of her isolation brought tears to her eyes. No one knew her anymore. They didn't question her actions like Naruto. They wouldn't secretly watch her training like Sasuke. Nobody would love her like Naruto did. Nobody would hurt her like Sasuke did. No one would be here for her, for pain or love. She'd give anything in the world to have them back. She would give up her job, her career, her house, all of her money, her journals,** anything** to get them back. There wasn't anybody like her two friends. She could never replace the indents they made on her life and how they molded her personality to fit the shinobi world. She would never replace them even if she could.

"I'm all alone. Why did you leave me?" Her hands shot up to her face as she felt her knees shake. She wanted to collapse and cry in agony. She was tired of being here without a purpose. What was she here for? Nothing. She couldn't think of anything. But, she used to be here for a reason and that was to keep Team 7 going. She was there to make Sasuke and Naruto work together. She was supposed to be the glue for the team.

"How can I be worth anything if my reason is gone?" She cried. Everyone was sad when Team 7 was officially broken after the War. They cried at the memorial like Sakura, but for different reasons. People's lives were lost in it. Every shinobi felt grief towards the large funeral, but they showed pity towards Sakura. That day she thought she was going to die from her turmoil. However, as the months passed and the sad faces returned to happy smiles, Sakura's face remained the same and the misery continued to progress worse. She cried every night and suicide was only a game inside her head. She was broken. Still is.

"Naruto." She shivered.

"Sakura-Chan." Sakura's head shot up as she stared at the woman near her.

"Hinata."

* * *

**A/N:**

**Sakura is depressed. Did anyone noticed? xD Ok. Just making sure. Anywho, that's the bums. Yeah? Next chapter will reveal the true reason of Sakura's depression. Ok, maybe not the whole reason but the main cause. DUN DA DUN! HINATA TO THE RESCUE! Ok. I'm just hyper.**

Read and Review, please!

P.S: Is anyone hungry for InoSaku yet? I sure am. 


	5. A Funeral for my Once Loved Youth

Sakura pressed her face into her hands as Hinata poured the tea. Neji stood by, intently watching every move as the heiress comforted Sakura.

"Brother, would you mind leaving us?" Hinata asked. (1) Sakura tried to hide her face. Her sudden burst of emotion had finally died down till there was only embarrassment and shame. _I can't run from this now. She caught me. _A cup was scooted towards her. The sound of the sliding cup loud in Sakura's ears as Neji grunted in recognition and exited the room.

"Now that we have privacy," Hinata emphasized the last word. Sakura heard Neji scoff and walk down the hall. Her counselor smiled in apology before lifting her own tea.

"Tell me about the…breakdown." Hinata cautiously asked. Sakura rubbed her eyes. She wished she just held it in instead of being a baby. Now she had to face the consequences of showing her feelings, she had to explain them to someone. Every time she tried to explain her feelings they were shot down and disregarded or made a fool of. Ultimately, Sakura felt like an idiot for every feeling what she felt. Her feelings weren't worth her time. They just caused problems for her and others.

_You're annoying._

"Do I have to?" Sakura muttered as she removed her hands from her face and peered up at Hinata. She placed her clipboard down.

"No, but it'd be for the best." Hinata assured. She placed her tea down and examined Sakura. "Are you uncomfortable with telling me?"

Sakura nodded. "Yes, it's uncomfortable."

Hinata gazed into her eyes a moment longer before looking down at her tea. "I can sense it."

Sakura ripped her gaze away and looked at the polished, wooden floor. She had forgotten what Lee said. Hyūgas had the power to feel another's feelings. Hinata probably felt a lot of mixed emotions inside of her. Sakura lightly clenched her teeth.

Sakura felt Hinata's eyes glued to the side of her face. She wouldn't meet her gaze, she wouldn't, she wouldn't…Sakura looked back at Hinata.

"Is it true that you can look into someone's eyes and see their soul and feel their feelings?" Sakura asked. Hinata almost flinched with a frown. She seemed to ponder on the idea before smiling.

"I can say that we're good at recognizing feelings." Hinata responded in a quiet voice as she sipped her tea. Sakura stared at the fine, porcelain cup.

"What do you mean?" Sakura asked. The conversation was going away from her now. She was relieved. However, she had a feeling in the pit of her stomach that Hinata noticed what she was doing. Hinata wasn't dumb.

"I will give you an example." Hinata replied before turning towards the shoji.

"Neji, you can come in." On cue Neji quickly entered from behind the sliding door. Sakura was half amused and upset that he was listening on their conversation. _Eavesdropper…  
_  
"Yes, Hinata-sama?" Neji replied without any shame. Sakura was tempted to glare at him but didn't when his eyes slowly scanned the room and rested on her. She felt the hairs of her back raise as he seemingly probed her mind with his gaze. Hinata smiled.

"I want you to taste this tea. I think it tastes a little _different_, perhaps an herbal poison?" Hinata amused. Neji did not question her tone before grabbing the cup and gingerly testing the tea. The corner of his eyebrows twitched as the rest of his face remained still. He was completely unfazed whether he drank poison or not. Sakura cautiously watched just in-case Hinata wasn't joking.

"This tea tastes normal." Neji mundanely replied. "I must return to Hiashi-sama, he requires his medicine."

He turned towards Sakura. His eyes roamed the room again before landing on her. "When will the next prescription bottle be ready, Haruno-sensei?" Sakura readjusted to the question, switching from curiosity and annoyance to friendly acquaintance. (2)

"It should be ready by next Friday. Hanataro should be able to deliver the bottle, but be sure he gets led to the right place. He gets lost fairly easy. Other than that, is Hiashi-sama improving?"

A negative silence followed. Hinata's eyes darkened as she looked down in worry. Neji still was unmoved.

"No, it seems his illness is progressing." Neji exhaled from his nose.

Sakura politely nodded. "I will send one of my upper-doctors to examine him. If things don't do well I'll personally come and do a checkup."

Neji nodded and excused himself with a bow. He disappeared behind the shoji. Hinata recovered in the small amount of time that she wasn't on the spotlight.

"As I was saying, did you see Neji's reactions?" She asked, disarming the saddened silence that had consumed her. _It was obvious she's worried about her father's wellbeing._ Sakura raised an eyebrow.

"No. He didn't do anything?" Sakura questioned more than stated. She wasn't sure if she missed something or not.

Hinata nodded with a gentle smile. "When he tastes something he loves his eyebrows twitched. When he's curious about things his eyes wander the room. When he is upset he changes his breathing to make it less obvious." Hinata informed. Sakura frowned.

"How do you know all of this?" She was starting to wonder if Hinata studied people in her spare time. Hinata steadily filled her tea again.

"If you ever noticed, my relatives and clan members don't really have facial reactions that portray their true emotions." Sakura nodded. Now that she thought of it Hinata was right. They really had no personality.

"We grow to learn the smallest of details that change when they're in certain moods. So when we do go out in the world we easily notice people's emotions." Hinata hummed as she put the tea kettle down. Sakura eyed her own tea and picked it up to take a sip, washing down the information she learned.

"That would make sense."

"Yes, however, you still need to tell me why you broke down." Hinata suggested while she peeked from behind her own teacup. Sakura cleared her throat to stop the tea from gurgling back up in surprise.

"I see that I didn't escape." Sakura mumbled as she glanced to the side. Hinata shook her head.

"You underestimate us, Sakura."

"Us?" Sakura asked as she peeked around, searching for others. Nobody was there except them.

"Yes. Everyone you used to be close to. You avoid us. I have many theories why but each time you prove me wrong with your new actions." Hinata enlightened. Sakura bit her lip. She felt herself build up a wall and want to lash out. Nobody had the right to pry her feelings open like a bear trying to get the honey. If she wanted to reveal her emotions she would, but she didn't. Nobody could get all of her emotions out. They weren't worth it and the person didn't need to know. Nobody except Sakura needed to know how she felt.

"It should be my problem. Not yours, Tsunade's, the village's, or anyone else's. I could take care of myself." Sakura warned. She felt her hands grip her sweatpants to hold back her anger. Even if it was Hinata, Sakura would bark at her if she went too far. Hinata noticed this and sighed.

"I'm only trying to help. We all are just trying to help." Hinata shifted in her seat and played with her teacup.

"Help what? You guys make it sound like I'm going to explode one day and kill everyone." Sakura seethed. Hinata flinched.

"With what you're doing now, we could have that assumption. And we're trying to get the old Sakura back. The one who dreamed, smiled, and could hear a mile away fighting with Ino-senpai."

Sakura shook her head. "There's nothing wrong with me." Everyone had problems and Sakura had one just like everyone. She was no different from Hinata to Kiba to Shikamaru or Choji.

"You do though. Why else did you breakdown?" Hinata pressed further. Slowly Sakura began to notice Hinata wasn't as innocent and kind as she was before. She was pressing Sakura's buttons and she knew it. Why would she do that? She'd only do that if she enjoyed watching her struggle. Sakura's clenched her jaw.

"Dammit, everyone breaks down once and a while. You have problems, too. You're still shy around new people, too modest, low self-confidence." Sakura pointed out. Hinata lightly shook her head.

"Those could be easily solvable. Also, those can't compare with what you're experiencing. That's characteristic problems, not emotional, Sakura."

Sakura glared. "You have emotional problems, Hinata. Don't act like I'm the only one."

Hinata was taken back how bad Sakura was defending herself. She didn't expect Sakura to get this angered. _I should've listened to Ino's advice…_  
"Sakura, you have it worse. You cry every day and—"

"I cry every day? I don't." Sakura barked. Hinata bit her lip and tried to say something but Sakura interrupted. She wasn't going to be made the antagonist here. She wasn't going to be the only one who was shown to be a crybaby. Frustration had taken hold of her mind as she grew frantic to end this interrogation. Her hands shook as she clenched her pants

"What about you? You cry practically every day! You never got over Naruto's death! YOU'RE NOT PERFECT EITHER! There are still rumors that you cry every night! That you visit his tombstone every day during lunch and offer him instant noodles! YOU CAN'T LET GO EITHER, HINATA! STOP ACTING LIKE YOU DID!" Sakura screamed, shooting up and knocking the kettle over. Her shoulders heaved in anger as her eyes frantically darted to examine Hinata's movements, waiting for her to retaliate.

Sakura's breathing practically echoed in her ears as her eyes adjusted to the room.

There was no reaction. Hinata remained there, wide eyed.

Tears formed at her eyes as she her shoulders shook in pain. Sakura felt herself instantly calm down. The look of fear in her lavender eyes drained Sakura's violent intent away. Hinata was always that one person nobody could hurt. She grew up as the baby of the group that Sakura and the other teams formed. She broke that today. She had hurt Hinata. She crossed the boundary of being a friend to a backstabber. But her anger was still there. She could feel her bottom lip and knuckles tremble in anticipation. She had to move around. _I have to beat something._ Tears slid from Hinata's eyes before Neji hastily slid the shoji and kneeled beside Hinata's side. He examined her, searching for wounds before noticing the tears. He growled and glared at Sakura.

"Get out of here." He barked. Sakura glared at him before stomping out of the door. The feeling of sympathy towards Hinata quickly left as she marched down the hall. She heard Hinata trying to talk, but inevitably wail. A pang of guilt hit her. Sakura tried to push it away. A door slammed open as Hiashi inched out of the room, a solid, extravagant cane in hand. He was adorned in the finest of silks as sleepwear.

"Excuse me, Haruno-senpai." Hiashi respectfully said before hobbling down the hallway.

"Hinata-Chan, Hinata-Chan!" He groaned as he made his way down. Sakura noticed his obvious limp and cringed as more guilt was dumped on her. She was complimented by one of the most prestigious clans by the respected suffix by the strictest leader. And yet, in the pain and illness he had, he was going to go find out that she had struck his daughter with insults.

"There, there." She heard from the back as she exited the building.

The man's old voice comforted Hinata. Sakura could hear the concern and raw fatherly love that had bloomed when he became ill.

"Time will heal all wounds."

_**Liar.**_

* * *

_**Liar.**_

Sakura accusingly stared at the memorial park. She ignored the intricate, beautifully crafted headstone that resembled the famous Naruto Bridge with the even more renowned person on it, Naruto, with a big cheesy grin. In the back it had the nation's gratitude, signed by all the Kages. Her eyes were rimmed red, tears threatening to fall.

"You said you'd live with me." She reminded him. The statue said nothing but kept smiling with its thumbs up. After he killed Sasuke, Naruto went into a depression just like Sakura. The dreams and expectations of Team 7 to be reunited and happy again were crushed. Their aspirations revolved around that dream. Now it was gone and could never work.

"You promised me that we'd make it out together." Sakura surprisingly recovered faster with Naruto's help, but he didn't. He still couldn't forgive himself. He swore he would've died with Sasuke. He even promised the traitor.

"You promised me, Naruto." She bitterly closed her eyes and remembered their last night together. Under the covers, he held her close and told her that he was happy to have her but his eyes said otherwise. His body felt cold just like his heart. He wasn't entirely happy, but he was. With his arms around her, Sakura felt alive. Without them, there was nothing.

"Why did you go and kill yourself!" Sakura screamed and hit the side of the glistening, wet marble, sending a good chunk flying from the tombstone. He didn't deserve this! He had to live longer to be given such a memorial! He let people's dreams down! This wasn't the Naruto she loved! The Naruto she loved had loved would've been with her right now, smiling! This Naruto, this imposter, this stupid man, this…traitor was here. Where was her Naruto? The one who would've never committed suicide.

Sakura fell to her knees and touched the ground. He died when this Naruto died, somewhere deep inside.

"Why did you have to be selfish and die by yourself, by your own hands?" Sakura cried as hot tears streamed from her cold face. Her long, pink hair shrouding her face from the world as she clawed at the dirt. He didn't even leave note! He never said I love you one last time! He never gave me one, last kiss!

Sakura remembered the single kunai and the Nine-tails fox twitching the manipulated corpse. It was trying to escape but was decaying with the body. She found him when he was in the stiff stage of death. He was dead. He was gone from the world. Nothing would bring him back. Sasuke had tempted him and he took the bait.

Sakura screamed at the tombstone and pounded at the engravings. Naruto didn't derserve this! Suicide shouldn't be rewarded or respected! He was trash! He left everyone to escape his own pain! Naruto left Sakura to save himself.

For once, Naruto cared for himself and only himself. He left the world alone. Sakura sloppily hit the statue again, her knuckles bleeding. She could feel her pinky throb in pain. _Sprained or broken, who cares. _

"You're a liar. You couldn't save Sasuke-kun." Sakura drowned in her whimpering. She hit the stone again and heard a crack in her pinky. It was broke now.

"You couldn't even save yourself."

"How could you be called a hero?"

"How could you be called a good friend when you took your own life and happiness from everyone?"

"How could you even, for one second, let alone ONE TIME, call yourself a good person?"

Sakura slumped against the statue in defeat.

"How could die with the thought of leaving me?"

"Didn't you love me?"

"What did death have that I didn't?"

Sakura allowed the tears to stream as the rain slowly drizzled, cooling her sweaty face.

"Why did you guys leave me alone with this misery?"

Naruto's statue continued to smile.

Sasuke's small tombstone beside his was left unrecognized and overpowered by Naruto's. Its small stone pile leaned against the statue.

Sakura took a stone from the pile and placed it on the other side of Naruto's. She placed it on the plot vacancy.

"Wait for me."

* * *

**A/N:**

**1. in the Japanese version of Naruto, Hinata addresses him like a brother. So I thought it'd be cute to make her to do it the American way. **

**2. Neji addresses her as sensei because it is used to refer to ****or address teachers, doctors, politicians, and other authority figures. It is used to show respect to someone who has achieved a certain level of mastery in an art form or some other skill.  
**


	6. Oh, your Girl? I Thought I Recognized!

The days turned into weeks until finally Sakura encountered a letter in her mailbox one morning. Surprised that she got something other than bills, Sakura grabbed the letter instead of throwing it away and went into her house, strolling into her study. She plopped into the chair and grabbed her letter opener given to her for her birthday from Lee. He said it was too risky to open letters without one, chiding her about how the letter could have been dipped in deadly poison.

She opened it and looked at it. _Oh, great. _

This letter was rescheduling her mission's departure for tomorrow. Sakura frowned. This was abrupt and interrupted her appointment with Hinata. Sakura sulked deeper. She hadn't heard from Hinata since then. The guilt was starting to seep into her as each day passed. She would have to make amendments before it was too late. Sakura punished herself by smacking the letter opener against her leg. How could she have done that to Hinata? Out of all the people, Hinata should've been the last. _So stupid._

Sakura skimmed the debriefing and reasons why the leave was so sudden. She stopped when she found what she was looking for, her teammates. She closely inspected the names.

_Haruku Anshi_

_Narita Hikari_  
_Yamamoto Kenji_

_Haruku Chikako_  
_Haruku Satouko_

Sakura continued to read along. _Ok, I have the equipment ready. They might need further examination. However, I think I n_--- Sakura's eyes darted back up in realization.

"Kenji!?" Sakura harshly whispered with widened eyes. She shook her head. No, no she couldn't see him again, not after what happened. It would be too much to bear knowing that he saw her emotional. She didn't want to see the pity in his eyes. Sakura quickly ran her hand over her face in worry. What was she going to do? He---

Wait, why the hell was she reacting like it was the worst thing in the world? Sakura glared at herself before shaking the whole thought off. Kenji was a goofball. She didn't need to worry about his thoughts.

Sakura sighed and pushed her bangs out of her face. She needed to pack and quickly buy rations. Sakura pushed herself out of her chair and walked towards her room. Once there she dragged out backpack and began to fold clothes suitable for the mission and place them inside. She decided to place her medical journal in there until she remembered it was completed. She sighed and bowed her head in irritation. She had to go buy a new one. _I'll just put it on my list._

After packing what she had Sakura neatly stuck her new weapons inside her kunai-pouch. She left her room and went back to her study. She warily looked around for any suspicious figures before removing a particular book on her bookcase. A secret mechanism clinked and the bookcase went slightly ajar with a loud creak. Sakura hummed to herself as she opened the cloaked door and closed it behind her as she stood at the top of the musty, stone spiral-staircase. She had this house built personally for her. Sakura skipped the first step, knowing that it triggered a trap, and stepped on the second. The torches along the sides of the curving walls burst into flames. She descended the stairs.

_Skip step forty-one, skip step fifty-two_, she told herself as she skipped over them with ease. Within a minute she had reached the bottom and stared ahead of her. Her green eyes glinted sadly at the sight before her as she bowed down in gratitude.

"Thank you, Naruto." She whispered as she approached the chests and display cases before her. Filled to the brim of the chests were pieces of Ryō that shined brilliantly in the torch-light. Against every wall was an artifact of great importance to each nation, Sakura never learned all of their names or origins. However, she appreciated every single piece and never thought of selling a single one, or mentioning it at the least. _Thank you, Naruto._ She had received this all when Naruto died in his will. She went over to a wardrobe and opened it, revealing hundreds of small pouches. She snatched one and filled it with the coins until it was heavy and full. Naruto received all of this as gifts for destroying the opposing forces of Sasuke, Madara, and Kabuto. The priceless antiques were in appreciation from all the nations that fought in the war against the three. Sakura tied the pouch and deeply bowed, her eyes staring at the ground.

"Thank you, Naruto." No matter how much she said it, she still felt bad for having all of this. She had never deserved so much. She could've had more if she didn't donate half of it to Naruto's favorite ramen stand. _He would've liked that a lot_. Sakura's face brightened into a small smile while picturing how his facial expression would've been.

-------------

Sakura left most of the money except for a couple thousand to buy rations and other necessities she found at the market. She walked to a familiar stand before bowing.

"Good evening, Oso-sama." The old man glanced up with a bright, toothy smile despite a few teeth missing. Sakura treated him with respect. He was one of the very few living veterans of the fight against the Kyuubi. He spent the rest of his days by making bentos and rations. Sakura always visited him because he knew how to make the best.

"Ah, Sakura-Chan, welcome back! How many days this time?" Oso asked while slowly creeping to the back of his stand with his wobbly cane.

"Fifteen at the most, please." She responded. He nodded and retrieved the required amount at a snail's pace. Sakura held her patience with him because it was worth her time.

"Here you go." He said with a smile. Sakura gave him the amount of money required and left with another bow. He waved it off.

"You're so formal, Sakura-Chan. I believe you can end it." He suggested. Sakura didn't respond but nod, not really agreeing. She left with the rations in a large, paper bag. She was thankful it had handles on it. She continued down the street until she saw a familiar man. Her shoulders stiffened as she felt her back hairs lift. She had to blend into the crowd. _How can you do that Sakura when you have a bright, red shirt and bright, pink hair? _

"SAKURA-CHAN!" Kenji screamed at the top of his lungs. Everyone thankfully ignored him since it was common to yell advertisements at the marketplace. Kenji frantically waved her over. Sakura noticed that he was in a group around his age. She sucked in the patience she had and walked over, hoping he had something good to say. _No, it's Kenji. He could hardly comprehend a logical thought._Once she reached the group she felt all eyes on her. She looked around at them and was only somewhat familiar with one face. With Kenji there was another guy and three girls. The other guy had shaggy, spiky, white hair with purple eyes and a very ghostly skin color. The girl closest to him had shoulder-length red hair with cerulean eyes. Her skin was fair but looked almost tan against the other guy's. Sakura's eyes warily shifted to the side to the other two girls. They both had black hair and fair skin. However, one was taller and looked more mature than the other. She had bangs almost covering above her eyes and long hair to her lower back. What caught Sakura's attention was that she had incandescent silver eyes. _Family bloodline?_ The other girl was considerably smaller and had bright, shameless green eyes lined with eyeliner. She had her arms crossed and a smug smile. Sakura felt herself want to turn on her heel and leave until Kenji interrupted before she attempted to escape.

"You never told me you were going on the same mission as us! It's such an honor!" Kenji smiled before making some noise of remembering something.

"Oh! Oh! These are the other teammates, my friends that are going with us!" He explained while gesturing to them all.

The short, dark-haired girl glared at him. "You mean she's coming with us?"

The taller one smiled and leaned over a little to be near her face, "Feisty today, are we?"

The girl snorted and looked away. The redhead gave a friendly smile.

"My name is Haruku Chikako." She greeted before turning to the white haired man. "This is Haruku Anshi."

Sakura looked between them. "You guys are related?" She hardly could see the resemblance. The man looked away with narrowed eyes but a blush. The redhead blushed as well.

"Newly weds. By the way, I'm Haruku Satouko. Anshi's cousin." The taller, black-haired girl answered. She smirked as she wrapped an arm around the smaller girl. "This is Narita Hikari, a little feisty thing. Stopped growing when she was sixteen. How tall are you?"

Hikari growled and sharply elbowed the older girl. "Stop being an ass."

Satouko smiled, "I could say the same."

Kenji cleared his throat to return the attention back to him. "Hikari is my adopted siste—"

"No I'm not." Hikari interrupted with a glare. "I would never be related to someone as dumb as you."

Kenji growled and began to throw a mini-fit and started cursing at the girl. She returned the aggressive gestures with a confident smile.

Satouko sighed. "Long story short, they were spies. Came here and got converted to us after befriending Chikako and me, Anshi was originally their main target so they could get info on the bloodlines here. When Naruto was still temporary Hokage they were let in on the condition to never get in contact with their village's shinobi. Kenji is long distant cousin of Chikako, Hikari was Kenji's fake sister, Anshi is my cousin, Anshi married Chikako so Kenji and them are his step-cousins, I'm not sure if Hikari likes that, and, between us, Hikari is all mine." Satouko leaned in with a wolfish smirk. Sakura blushed at how open Satouko was with her sexuality and claims.

"I'm not your property!" Hikari growled as she tugged on Kenji's ear. Chikako frowned and intervened in the 'sibling' dispute. Satouko pulled Hikari into a forced embrace as she squirmed. Anshi finally looked over Sakura.

"You used to be my medic when I was smaller." Anshi reminded. Sakura drew a blank. His frown furthered.

"You saved my life three times from my genetic disease." Sakura still couldn't remember. Anshi seemed almost repulsed by the idea.

"My bloodline and chakra was triggered when I felt intense emotions and caused me to burn up and those in near contact with me. You cured it." Sakura finally remembered.

"Oh, right. I remember now. One of the most serious cases of genetic mutations." Sakura remembered because she had to promise her head to the clan if she leaked any of their secrets. It was one of the most brutal cases she had, but made an excellent medical journal, bloodline secrets were kept in the shadows. Anshi seemed somewhat satisfied that she remembered before grumbling about. Chikako quickly bowed.

"Thanks for helping him. He's appreciative as well but has a hard time showing it." She emphasized on the last part. Anshi almost rolled his eyes as he crossed his arms.

"Thanks," he muttered. Satouko grinned.

"Don't worry, underneath the tough guy act is a cute, little, sweet boy who loves spending days-off cuddling with his wife, helping at the orphanage, and reading. He really isn't as badass as he appears." Satouko clarified as Hikari still struggled to escape the hold Satouko had on her.

"Yes, yes! Happy days!" Kenji interrupted with a growl. "Excuse me while we talk about the mission and do some PRODUCTIVE conversations!"

The group shrugged and left the two alone. Sakura was still unsure what to say about the group until Kenji sighed.

"Want me to explain to you everyone's quick profile?" He offered. Sakura, still digesting what went on, nodded. Kenji smiled.

"Satouko," he pointed to the taller, dark-haired girl with molten silver eyes. "She is openly gay. She flirts with everyone, even Chikako though she excuses it as family love. But she's smitten with Hikari. Hikari loves her too. They're the type of behind-doors people. Satouko is good in every aspect." Kenji said the last part slowly and nodded his head to her. Sakura looked over and quickly noticed a familiar tattoo on her right shoulder. _She's ANBU_.

"She's an ex." Kenji spoke as if he read her thoughts. "She quit the heavy stuff since Hikari entered her life."

"Hikari is good at espionage. She's good at genjutsu but they rest…she just sucks." Kenji rolled his eyes at his sibling's abilities.

"Chikako has a bloodline. I'm her cousin through my mother who came from the family with the bloodline. They were killed out. We originally came from the Rain Village. Chikako came here to broaden her horizons and left the village behind. Nobody knew she had the bloodline. I don't have it, not strong enough. Besides that, Chikako can use her bloodline good enough, you'll see soon. She excels in taijutsu and chakra control." He said with enthusiasm. Sakura could tell he adored her.

"Anshi on the other hand," Kenji scowled, "he's an ass. He thinks he's all cool and everything but he isn't as good. Sure, he can do some cool ninjutsus, use his bloodline with ease and is the heir of his family. Yeah, ok, maybe he sounds pretty good but he isn't. Trust me, I can beat him any day!" Kenji demonstrated this by flexing his biceps. "I just let him win most of the time, ya' know? Anyways, he's ok at most things except taijutsu and genjutsus. Should've saw Hikari and Chikako take him on. It was all gravy until Satouko decided to join in and within one second had Hikari pinned to the ground with her shirt off. When they get close like that, you gotta' run. Satouko won't warn when she's in the mood." Kenji babbled further on about things that weren't important to Sakura. She nodded until after a minute.

"I have to go Kenji. I will see you tomorrow at the gates at 9am sharp. Don't be late." She chided. He slouched in defeat.

"That's so early!" He cried out. Sakura shook her head.

"Be there."

Kenji cowered a little, "Ok! Ok! Anything for Sakura-Chan!"

With that, they departed with small goodbyes. Sakura replayed the information given to her. Anshi was good, she knew he was. Kenji was just being defensive for his lack of skills where his rival won. Anshi was the power-hitter. Satouko was an all-around, impressive ally. Chikako would be good for close-up combat and decoy. Hikari would be good at luring and undercover operations. Kenji on the other hand was still a mystery. Sakura had hope. She had good teammates that were evenly distributed. She was just prayed that they didn't goof off. Their personalities contradicted one or two of their group. She didn't want to listen to them bicker the whole mission or have her eyes violated with public affection between Satouko and Hikari.

What did she get placed into? She wasn't there to babysit.

Sakura continued to walk along the street until she reached the residential district. The crowds of people were long gone and there wasn't a person insight. Sakura continued to walk along until she heard a faint sound.

She glanced down to find a black kitten staring up at her with big, golden eyes. She frowned. She lightly tried to shoo that cat with her hand but it wouldn't leave her alone. Sakura began to walk, hoping it wouldn't follow her. She hurried along the path and turned around. Surely the kitten was following her, but something was wrong. The front, right leg was in a limp. Sakura sighed.  
_  
No matter how hard I try…_

Sakura quietly walked back to the kitten and picked it up before continuing on her way. The cat happily pawed at her hair with its good paw. Sakura ignored its playfulness. She would just heal the leg, feed it a little, and send it to the animal shelter. It would get quickly adopted with how adorable it looked.

Sakura glanced down to find the feline intently looking down at her. She frowned and looked back up. She felt herself somewhat taken back how the cat was staring at her. Something about the cat seemed…comforting. The kitten mewed. Sakura petted it.

"W- I'll be home soon. I will be home soon." Sakura quickly corrected herself as she neared her house with cat and supplies in hand. 

* * *

**A/N:**

All those characters are mine and my girlfriend's OCs. I threw them in there because I required a handful of people to go on the mission with Sakura, because I wouldn't be able to skip her teammates for the mission. So, having characters already made I threw them in. Chikako, Kenji, and Hikari are my girls and Anshi and Satouko are mine. Other than that, it's mission time! Sakura seemed to have found a new friend along her way home! Hmm!


	7. To Give me Confidence to Stare

Sakura stood outside the Hyūga clan's gates as dawn slowly approached. She held a large sack in her arms as the guards warily looked around before opening the gates. Her breath was frozen in the icy air as she shivered.

"Hinata-sama would've wanted it so." One mentioned to the loyal youth beside him. A grandfather and grandson sentry, passing of tradition and common sense, Sakura admired the family. They looked out for each other even if it was the weakest, disregarded branch. Sakura slipped in. She listened as the elder silently made a light flicked. The other hidden sentries of the manor did the same. It was clear. Sakura hurried into the house and crept across the wooden floor. She was still unwanted here by Neji and Hiashi so she had to be careful, especially of Neji.

Sakura snuck towards Hinata's room, cautious with each step she took. The bag rustled and Sakura's neck hairs rose. She heard light rustling in the rooms' right and left of her. She froze. Yoru _(1)_ popped from the bag and gave a loud meow. Sakura quickly jumped to the side as Neji's fingers barely grazed her hair and Hiashi's weakened kick grazed her ankle.

Both of them growled as Sakura let out a gasp of fear. _Shit_.

"You damned woman," Hiashi cursed as he coughed. Sakura's trained ear picked up his severe sickness and gritted her teeth.

"Hiashi-sama, with all respect, please, go lay down!" Sakura begged as she stepped forward, concerned over his conditions. Hiashi activated his Byakugan. Sakura lightly panicked.

"That's going to mak—"

"Don't play coy with me, Haruno! I won't let you deal another blow to my daughter!" Hiashi spat at her. Neji glared at her.

"You'll regret coming here again, Sakura." His teeth bore as the veins around his eyes throbbed. Sakura took slow steps back, trying to analyze her situation. She couldn't attack Hiashi or any of them. They would hold it against her and all she needed was the clan to be mad at her. Sakura's fingers twitched as Neji took a step closer. She was in the hallway, she couldn't go far. Sakura had to make calculated, perfectly executed moves. Even if one of them was sick they still were worthy foe.

Neji shot forward with great speed. Sakura felt the chakra on his fingertips lightly burn the side of her arm as she dodged the blow. She wasn't use of this close-combat. She hadn't been in a battle in too long. Sakura felt Yoru hiss at the sudden movements. Sakura gasped as she remembered Hiashi before evading a powerful strike to the chest. She fell to her knees and scrambled up and began to run.

"Dammit!" Sakura yelped as she sprinted down the corridor with Neji and Hiashi on her tail, Yoru meowing all the way. Sakura looked back for just a second, assessing her followers before smacking into a sturdy door, sending her falling to her rear as the person gasped.

"Byakugan!" She heard a deadly, feminine whisper as the door close and Hinata bore down her. Once she realized who it was she deactivated with a gasp and her mouth to her hand. The two girls looked behind Sakura.

"Sakura-san!" Hinata exclaimed as Neji and Hiashi slid to a stop and was about to pounce on Sakura. The woman flailed her arms around, lightly dropping the sack with the cat and supplies, causing the three Hyūgas to give her weird looks.

"Wait! Wait! Wait!" Sakura squealed quickly as she fled to the wall, backing against it for dear life.

"I came here to say sorry! My words were hypocritical and harsh! I shouldn't have said it!" Sakura confessed as she waved a pardoning hand at Neji and Hiashi. They both stood up from fighting positions to analyze Sakura's weird state.

"I also came here to ask a favor! It's truly uncalled for!" Sakura blurted. Hiashi growled.

"Why should we accept it after harassing the next head of the clan?" Hiashi said while glaring.

"You should be the one doing favors." Neji pointed out.

"What did you need, Sakura?" Hinata asked.

Sakura panted in fear before crawling over and snatching the bag. She quickly bowed deeply in front of Hinata.

"Watch my cat, Yoru! She needs to be taken care of while I'm on my mission today! All the supplies are in the bag with her!" Sakura presented the paper bag to Hinata. The black cat jolted its head from the bag and let out a pitiful meow as if greeting the heiress.

Hinata smiled as she giggled. "Yes. I will."

* * *

Sakura walked to her meeting at the gates as Hinata followed her. Apparently, Hinata had a few favors herself.

"You will need to eat more protein." Hinata advised. She sounded like her mother. Satouko eyed the two as Anshi talked quietly with Kenji and Chikako. Hikari stood near Satouko. Sakura was one minute late.

"Oh, Satouko!" Hinata exclaimed. The taller girl smiled.

"Yo," she replied. Hinata returned the kind smile.

"You took advance psychology, right?" She asked. Satouko nodded.

"I had to. It was required for my certain rank."

"Well, you will need to counsel Sakura while you're on the mission." Hinata stated. Sakura flinched as Satouko raised her eyebrow and all eyes were on her. Kenji gasped.

"YOU NEED A SHRINK?!" He gaped as Anshi glared and gave him a rightful smack. Chikako frowned and examined Sakura further as Hikari smirked.

"Go figure." She mumbled. Satouko nudged Hikari to be nicer.

"No problem. I will ensure I do an adequate job and keep all information secretive." Satouko said with a surprisingly calm, professional tone. Sakura wasn't sure if this was good sarcasm or not. Hinata nodded and patted Sakura's back.

"That's all I have. I better return home. Neji and Father might be having problems with the kitten."

Sakura nodded and stared at her group. Everybody gazed at her, wondering what she needed a shrink for. The awkward silence loomed.

"WELL! We better get going, shoo! Shoo!" Satouko ushered them forward. The group reluctantly departed as Sakura followed behind. Satouko joined with her and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. Sakura stiffened at the human contact.

"Don't worry, I will make sure it doesn't get out. I know, I know, I'm all grope and smirk but you'll learn to trust. I wasn't ANBU for nothing." Satouko murmured to her as Hikari kept glancing back with a venomous glare. Sakura nervously brushed off the arm, making Satouko smirk.

"You'll need to get used of me as well." Satouko suggested with the wolfish grin. Sakura lightly blushed and looked away. Was she getting hit on or not?

"Satouko, be careful or you'll not get a thing tonight!" Kenji warned, thumbing towards Hikari. The smaller girl growled.

"Shut up you dumb fuck!" She smacked him across the head. Anshi sighed.

"You two knock it off!" He yelled. Kenji and Hikari glared at him.

"What you going to do about it?!" She snarled as Kenji smacked his chest like a gorilla. "You want a piece of this man?!"

"Please, stop, we're not even far from the gates." Chikako pleaded. The two siblings turned towards her.

"YOU WANT SOME TOO!?"

Sakura groaned as Satouko tried to mend her and Hikari's relationship, saying that 'her flirting with the greatest medic ninja alive should be excused'.

_Meanwhile…_

"What do you think it wants, Hiashi-sama?" Neji asked the kitten stared at them. Hiashi gazed at it.

"I'm not sure."

The kitten loudly meowed and continued to repeat itself. The two men pondered on what it was trying to say.

"What do you want, cat?" Hiashi asked in a stern voice. The kitten rolled onto its back and swatted at Neji's hair, disregarding the question.

"I don't think it understands." Neji replied.

"Maybe it doesn't understand it's a cat." Hiashi assumed. Both nodded at the deep answer.

"Little creature," Neji readjusted the question, "do you want something from us or anything?"

The kitten meowed and Neji glared at it. Hiashi sighed in annoyance

"I don't think we will ever know." Hiashi said as he gingerly sipped his tea.

"It's like that one add…of those one suckers…I cannot recall it but the kid always shamelessly asks how many licks it takes to get to the center of this lollipop to a scholarly owl." Neji began, "and every time the owl steals the sucker, licks three times before biting it off."

Hiashi looked towards Neji, sighing.

"How cruel."

"Yes, it was. Their slogan applies perfectly to our situation." Their eyes roamed back to the kitten.

"The world may never know what that cat wants." Neji admitted. Hiashi sighed as he looked out at the sunrise.

"The world may never know, indeed."

The kitten impatiently meowed.

* * *

Ino casually walked by her mailbox each day, half heartedly opening to check if a letter from Sakura appeared. Of course there wasn't. She gave a small smile and continued to walk past it without much interest.

She stopped and retraced her steps to longingly gaze at the box, wishing, hoping Sakura would mail her. She missed her friend. She had forgotten how much of a child she still was.

_Can't blossom fully_, Ino told herself. Sakura got lost on the way. She needed guidance. Ino would be there to fulfill the duty she promised herself to complete.

"Sakura," Ino sighed as she resumed walking to her next post. She was happy her mission came with a temporary house with a mailbox, but what use was it if nobody was going to mail her?

* * *

Sakura woke in the middle of the cold night at their first base camp. She stretched and rolled over, finding a comfier position than before. She sighed as she found the right spot as warmth enveloped her side. She cracked an eye to see Kenji nestled up against her. She frowned and turned her back to his back, but not moving from the heat. It was too cold to be stingy. She soon noticed she was bunched between Kenji and Chikako. Anshi preferred to lightly sleep and patrol the area like there was an ambush. _Most unlikely_, Sakura scoffed as she got on her back. However, the need for sleep seemed to have washed right off. She felt alert with the sudden coldness and full moon. Her eyes hazed over as she stared up at its hollowness.

_This isn't a time to be a baby_. Sakura sat up and rubbed her eyes.

"Dammit," Sakura groggily cursed. "Can't get any sleep with it being this cold."

She opened her eyes to see an interesting sight. Her face flushed. Hikari had abandoned her sleeping bag to tightly worm in Satouko's and sleep with her. She gazed upon the couple, marveling that the sleeping bag was big enough. Satouko had her arms around her, pulling her in. Her hair was released from its usual low-ponytail. Their limbs were entangled just like their hair. Sakura frowned and tore her gaze away with reddened cheeks.

"Lucky," she growled as she got up from her sleeping bag. She wished she had some heat for herself so she could easily go back to sleep. She glanced down towards Kenji and Chikako. They weren't much help, pushing their cold beds against her. Sakura scratched the back of her neck as she roamed at the edge of their camp in the thicket.

"Anshi," she called out. There wasn't a single rustle of bushes or leaves as he appeared before her with a slightly concerned face.

"Is something wrong?" He asked as he took a step forward. Sakura was somewhat taken back on how nice he was without the others awake. She shook her head.

"I couldn't go to sleep." She mentioned while nodding over. Anshi peered over her and noticed the two cousins hogging Sakura's empty sleeping bag and cuddling against each other. He smiled.

"It runs in their family to hog and snuggle. Sort of like dogs." He mildly joked. Sakura at least had to give him a smile.

They both jumped into the trees where they were sheltered away from the light, autumn breeze. Up in the branches and leaves Sakura noticed Anshi made a makeshift tree fort. He had his blankets wrapped around the branches to act as a wind block. He coaxed her in and she sat down next to him as he monitored the forest below them.

"You picked a good tree." Sakura complimented. He nodded in response. She examined him in the corner of her eye. With the moon serving as her only light, Anshi looked like a ghost with his paleness. His white hair glowed like celestial silk. His skin illuminated. However, she saw something past his lurid physical features. She noticed his facial structure and eyes. In the dark, they were black like onyx. Her heart pounded a little harder in realization. Anshi looked a lot like Sasuke, a ghostly avenger from the grave to haunt her.

Sakura swiftly looked away, catching Anshi's attention.

"You sure nothing is wrong?" He asked while turning towards her. Sakura bit her lip. He wasn't anything like Sasuke. He would never be this nice to her.

"I'm just cold." She responded and she wasn't lying. It was very cold. Anshi nodded and grabbed a blanket from his side.

"You can use this. I didn't need another blanket." He offered. Sakura shook her head while gazing into his eyes. _Their eyes are so similar…_

"No, I can't. You have to be cold." She declined. He shook his head and threw the blanket on her. Sakura flinched in surprise.

"My bloodline allows me to have a lot of chakra, more than any normal or trained shinobi can ever have. My secondary chakra type is electricity. I'm circulating my chakra flow more so I don't get cold. You do the math." He mumbled as he looked off in the distance. His dark eyes penetrated the night's stillness and searched for life. His handsome facial features were profound and softened in the moonlight. Sakura ripped her stare from him.

"Thank you Anshi." The man was nothing like her Sasuke. He was too nice for her. He had his looks but wasn't him. Sakura felt herself interested on how he could look like Sasuke, but didn't feel attraction towards him. After all he was married and not anybody she entirely new. There was a magnetic pull for his looks, or maybe for his heat, but she didn't act upon the light tug. It was barely noticeable.

Sakura shook her head. This mission was already a pain. Anshi looked too much like Sasuke. Kenji acted like Naruto. Sakura wrapped the blanket around her and rested her face into her knees.

"I can feel you're troubled," Anshi said. Sakura stiffened but didn't reply.

"I'm not sure what's wrong but I'm sure you'll be fine." He said. Sakura shook her head. That was such a lie. How could she be fine now if she wasn't fine for so long? There was a short pause.

"Are you scared of the dark?" Anshi asked. Sakura shook her head again. She flinched as the air throbbed with his chuckle.

"Chikako is. I wasn't sure if you guys were the same. If you had your hair cut, I would've mistaken you for her you know." He commented. Sakura didn't say anything as she leaned into the trunk. She instantly felt comfortable for some odd reason. Even if she was sliding slightly she didn't really care, she felt sleep welcoming her back.

"She is especially scared during storms. She always would deny it but she was terrified. It made me smile to see such a strong girl be so scared of something so…what's the word…weak sure isn't it…I'm not sure, but just to see her scared of a storm and the dark and not the blade of a kunai or brush with death. She would always run to me and ask if she could sleep with me for the night. We were only thirteen on our team and were already in love. I always welcomed her with open arms." Anshi trailed off in thought as he warmly smiled at the remembrance. Sakura had nodded off and slid onto Anshi's shoulder. He lightly flinched and glanced down. He sighed.

"You better hope Chikako doesn't find you like this." He mentioned. Anshi knew she wouldn't reply because she was obviously asleep.

"Can't say I didn't warn you if she comes and attacks, she might not believe me if I say you fell asleep." He randomly rambled. Sakura lightly snored. Anshi grinned.

"Alright, have it your way."

* * *

**A/N:**

**1. Yoru is a black cat. Yes, I'm making a BLEACH reference of Yoruichi who is able to take the form of a black cat. I couldn't resist.**

**I percieved that Hinata would be more of an apology-accept than grudge-holder so thus the easy makeup. And I included Ino and some of her thoughts so you guys could get a teaser on what's going to happen. This is a pretty slow boil story, I want to make Sakura's changes gradual and not sudden. But, hell, who knows.**

Reviews are nice! Haha


	8. So Hold Your Breath and Spare Me

"Oi! Anshi! Stay close to the group you show-off!" Kenji roared as he flailed after Anshi who was ahead, staying alert for enemies. That left only the three girls in the back. Chikako sighed.

"It's always a competition for them." She muttered. Sakura didn't pay attention as she stared at the back of the two men. How similar they were to Naruto and Sasuke…yet they were so different at the same time. Sakura eyes hazed over.

"Who cares as long as we don't hear it." Hikari grumbled. Chikako gave her a quizzical glance.

"Like you don't argue and compete." She mumbled. Hikari shot her a glare.

"Hey you redheaded bi—"Satouko covered her mouth and kissed her temple.

"Now, now let's stop this useless fighting. Chikako play fair, and Hikari you should be in a good mood since last night. You got your quota of cuddling." Satouko winked. Sakura and Chikako blushed as they looked away. Sakura felt uncomfortable with the straightforward affection and openness of their relationship. Apparently Chikako wasn't quite used of it either.

"Either way, shouldn't we be near the mission point by now?" Chikako asked. Satouko was quickly sucked back into the mission and ignored Hikari and her complaints.

"Yeah, the little village should be over that hill over there, near that big rock." Satouko pointed. Chikako tilted her head. There were a lot of hills by big rocks.

"That one?" She pointed out. Satouko shook her head.

"No! That one!"

"This one?"

"NO! THAT ONE!" She flailed her finger.

"OH! That one?"

"NO! NO! NO! THAT _ONE_!"

"OH! I got you! That **one**!"

"No, bullshit! _**That one**_! The one near the rock shaped like a dick!" Now that caught all of the girl's attention as they digested what Satouko said. All of them tilted their heads to see the rock formation better. Sakura's eyes widened. It was indeed a male's genital.

"I name that cock rock." Satouko smugly smirked. Chikako shook her head.

"I can't believe such a rock formation would exist." She commented. Hikari laughed.

"Only Satouko would notice that. I wish I brought my camera." Hikari huffed as she crossed her arms. Sakura looked down at the ground.

"I brought my camera." She replied. Hikari and Satouko's eyes widened in glee.

"SCORE!" Satouko yelled, surprising Anshi and Kenji.

"Hell to the fuck to the yeah!" Hikari cried out in victory. Sakura flinched at their melodramatic responses as Chikako smacked her face.

"Why did you have to say that?"

…

"So I press this button?" Anshi asked while examining the camera. He received a hard smack in the head from Hikari as she stomped back to the group that now stood before _cock rock_.

"Yes dumbass." She growled and stood by Satouko. Kenji whined he didn't have enough elbow space. Chikako scooted away from the couple. Sakura was at the other end near Kenji.

"Ok…taking picture in three seconds."Anshi announced. Satouko shook her head.

"My dear beautiful, pathetic cousin, that's not how you do it! You have to yell CHEESE before you press the button." Satouko informed. Anshi raised an eyebrow.

"Seriously. That's weird." Anshi shook his head before raising the camera up and steadying it on the group before the rocky penis.

"CHEESE!" He screamed, startling everyone as he took the picture.

"There. You have your picture. Now let's move on!" He ordered. Everyone happily obliged except Sakura. She wasn't even sure how she got dragged into the picture.

"I wish he said cheese properly so I could smile. I probably look stupid in the picture." Chikako stressed as she put her hands to her cheeks. Satouko waved off.

"I wasn't scared! I smiled all the way!" She boasted. Hikari elbowed her.

"You choked me from the surprise and made me gag when the flash went off." Hikari glared at her. Satouko sheepishly smiled and scratched the back of her head.

"Oh but you still love me, yeah?" She asked as she grabbed the smaller girl's hand. Hikari huffed and squeezed her hand.

"Whatever."

Chikako and Sakura lightly blushed looked away.

"They do this all the time. Fire and ice." Chikako muttered. Sakura only nodded to show she was listening.

"No matter what, no matter what type of fight they end up back to each other." Chikako said with some envy. Sakura was about to look at the redhead until Satouko piped up.

"You and Anshi are the same!" This time Chikako's face went completely red.

"No! They're nothing like you two!" Kenji butted in. "They have the decency to go to a room when they want some quality time! Unlike the time I walked in on you two in the Haruku Clan Garden or in the kitchen or that time at the movie theatre or in the bushes or—"

"Just shut up Kenji, you idiot." Hikari seethed. Kenji did what he was told.

Sakura gazed off into the distance as she listened to the constant bickering. She thought she would be terribly annoyed with it…but it reminded her of old times when it was common to hear arguing between a knuckleheaded blond and an infamous heartthrob. Sakura closed her eyes and took a deep breath. It was almost music to her ears.

"Oi! We need to stop fighting! I think Sakura-Chan is getting annoyed!" Kenji warned. With that, everyone was quiet for Sakura's sake as the feeling of reminiscence vanished, leaving Sakura cold once again. So cold and alone as Hikari whispered something to Satouko who laughed and Chikako running up to Anshi to give him a kind smile, Kenji glaring at Anshi, and Anshi giving a loving smile back at his wife.

So alone and cold.

* * *

Sakura sat outside, checking the children of the village with simple exams. Kenji was bragging to the kids as they waited for their turn. Chikako helped with distributing the gummy vitamins and helping distract the kids as they got their shots. Anshi and Satouko stood nearby as Hikari got first claims on her room.

Anshi sighed as he watched Chikako smile at a kid. Satouko caught the act and elbowed him in the ribs.

"Already thinking about kids, Anshi?" She asked with a smirk. Anshi blushed before looking away.

"No. I'm just bored. There is no action. Where are the enemy shinobi?" He grumbled. Satouko scoffed and hit him across the head.

"You're still too young to fool me." Satouko said and returned to watch the kids. "You're lucky though. You can actually have kids."

Surprised, Anshi turned his head to examine his cousin's longing expression as she watched the kids laugh and smile. Despite her rude and inappropriate personality she was a natural-mother.

"FOUND MY ROOM!" Hikari yelled from the second-floor of the cabin that was rented to them. Satouko's expression quickly changed as she smiled and grabbed her bag near her.

"You mean our room?" Satouko hollered before running into the place. Anshi watched with a warm smile and shook his head. The line of kids quickly grew small as they ran away to play and tell their parents of the shinobi that came to protect them. Chikako excused herself from helping and walked near Anshi, purposely brushing against his arm and leaning over near his ear.

"We better choose our room, Anshi." She suggested. Anshi froze up at the display of affection and nodded. The two disappeared in the house as Sakura shook her head. She was afraid to think what Hikari and Satouko were doing and what Chikako and Anshi were planning.

"I'm glad you came along, Sakura-Chan." Kenji said, surprising Sakura as the last kid left with a smiley band-aid.

"It was my duty." Sakura said as she stood up and stretched her arms, brushing off the surprise. Kenji smiled.

"I know but it is better that you came regardless." He said as he walked to the cabin's door. Sakura began to pack her leftover medical supplies.

"Why's that?" She asked while putting away her items. _Extra bandages, band-aids, ointments, alcohol, disinfectant, syringes, medicine, vitamins…_

"Because I'm always alone." Kenji muttered, almost too quiet for Sakura to hear. She raised an eyebrow and looked at him. He had his cousin and sister…well fake-sister.

"Satouko and Hikari are together like Anshi and Chikako. When they're near each other they're in their own worlds and I'm stuck in this one. Kind of lonely and depressing!" He heartily laughed but Sakura could sense the loneliness in his voice. She glanced away and began towards the cabin.

"There's one room left!" Chikako announced. "Down the hall near the bathroom!"

Kenji blushed.

"Guess we have to share a room, Sakura-Chan!" He gave a shameless smile. "It probably has only one bed like most but don't worry! I don't hog the blan—"

"I would rather sleep on the couch than share a room." Sakura stated. Kenji flinched and looked down at the ground. He frowned and kicked at the dirt.

"Well…I can sleep on the floor." He suggested. Sakura shook her head.

"I don't like sharing rooms with others." She never shared a room since Naruto was alive. She felt guilty if she shared a room with someone else, especially another man. She didn't need to have a person in a room with her like Kenji who reminded her of Naruto. She didn't want nobody to witness her state of weakness that occurred in the middle of the night, alone.

"Oh…well…I'm sorry…I shouldn't had put it that way…I know I'm sometimes straightforward but I really li—"

"It's ok, Kenji." Sakura softened a little. "It's not you. It's just me. I just don't like sharing rooms."

Kenji hopefully looked up, regaining some of his confidence. "Well I can sleep on the couch! You can have the bedroom!" His smile was wide and toothy. Sakura looked behind her and nodded.

"Thank you, Kenji." She said with appreciation and bowed lightly. Kenji blushed and looked down again, kicking a loose rock.

"So," he quietly began in a shy voice, "does that mean you like me somewhat?"

Sakura walked closer to the cabin door and stopped. _No, I don't like you._ _I don't even think I could ever like you like that. I'm not made for any relationship. _Sakura exhaled.

"Let's go inside, Kenji."

* * *

Sakura intently stared at the cabin's ceiling. The fan above her was frozen in time as the cold autumn air seeped under the window. She shifted further in the blankets as her brows furrowed.

_How long has it been…?_

She couldn't remember. She bit her lip to hold back her scream.

_Why couldn't they just stop…?_

Her eyes squeezed tightly as the yell manifested in her throat, tempting her to open her mouth.

_I can't deal with this anymore._

"Ah, Satouko!" Hikari's hushed voice flooded into Sakura's room. The medic shinobi jumped out of the covers with a roar. She stood on the bed, glaring at the ceiling, and began to punch the ceiling with little strength. If she didn't the second floor would collapse from her brute strength.

"It's getting late! Go to bed! We have a mission! This isn't a honeymoon!" Sakura loudly growled. She relentlessly hammered the ceiling until she heard nothing and she felt somewhat better. The cabin was completely quiet until Sakura heard a giggle.

"Told you, Hikari, that you were being too loud." She heard Satouko say above. Hikari groaned.

"Just keep going. I'm almost there, please." She begged. Sakura's eyebrow twitched.

"No, no! That's enough!" Sakura scolded. Hikari loudly whined.

"Aw come on, Sakura-Chan." Satouko persuaded. "Just let me finish my job like a good person I am and we will stop. Though…just for your information, I can go all night long."

Sakura blushed and shut her eyes at the mental images. "Just…QUIETLY!" She ordered. She heard Satouko giggle again and Hikari lightly gasp. Sakura stood there, listening until she caught herself doing so. Her eyes widened as she blushed. She was a pervert for listening. She quickly sat on her bed and covered her ears, humming a song. Why was she eavesdropping on their…their…their _stuff_?

_I'm just waiting and making sure they won't start again. Once…Hikari is satisfied then they will stop. I have to make sure. I have to listen otherwise Satouko would sneak another round in. _

Sakura unplugged her ears and heard a loud, long moan.

"Good god!" Kenji hollered from the living room. "That's enough!"

Sakura heard something above her. "Your sister wants more of me, Kenji."

"ENOUGH! ENOUGH!" Kenji screamed and began yelling "La-la-la I CAN'T HEAR YOU!'

Satouko laughed from above as Sakura could faintly hear Hikari's heavy breathing. These walls were way too thin.

"Time to go to bed!" Sakura ordered with her cheeks burning hotly, hitting the ceiling with her hand.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Done, we're done!" Satouko sighed in disappointment.

"Thank you, Sakura-san. They would've never stopped if you didn't make them." Chikako called from the other room down the hall.

"Yeah, thanks. _**A lot**_." Anshi replied. Sakura listened intently again.

"Thank you, Sato." Hikari's voice was only a very faint murmur that Sakura's trained ears could only catch. She heard Satouko happily make a sound in recognition. With her face burning hot as an intense sunburn, Sakura laid back down and got under the covers.

"Yeah! Thanks, Sakura-Chan!" Kenji called out. "You saved us all from a night of no sleeping!"

Sakura shook her head. The cabin was silent as she stared at the ceiling. Her eyes became heavy. Her breathing was becoming even.

For once, Sakura was too tired to think of the past and Naruto and Sasuke as she drifted off to sleep.

Mental images of Hikari being pleasured by Satouko filled Sakura's mind as she tossed and turned in bed as the bad dream continued.

* * *

**A/N:**

Well, late update but I'm sure the upcoming chapters shall make things better. Or not. Summer is coming around the corner and you guys will be in for a treat! Know why? BECAUSE I UPDATE FASTER!

**...**

**Well I'm excited! LOL! Either way, enjoy and good luck on your finals if you're still in school my dear readers!**

Keep reading and occasionally reviewing, please! 


	9. No Wise Words Gonna Stop the Bleeding

Satouko tapped her pen on her crude notebook as she intently stared Sakura down. The medic shinobi uncomfortably shuffled in her seat. She was used of Hinata's polite, kind gaze but Satouko's was piercing. She could feel the stare burn into her head as she looked at the ground, examining her more than interesting boots. Maybe it was a bad idea for Satouko to be her councilor. If this kept up, Sakura might go stark mad and start ranting every single problem of her life.

Sakura's eyes shifted to the window to watch Kenji play tackle football with the village's children. Chikako was putting band-aids on small scrapes as Anshi sat on the ground with all the little girls crowding around him, swooning and giggling; a few even taking refuge in his lap. Chikako glanced over and laughed while he gave a sheepish smile. Kenji yelled something to only have Hikari run out of nowhere and kicked him in the rear and onto the ground with a triumphant smirk.

"Now, Sakura-Chan, we're here for you and not watching those idiots." Satouko reminded in a suave voice before covering the window with the cabin's blinds.

"I don't think Hinata-Chan would be happy if I let you off the hook." Satouko sighed and plopped back down in her chair. Sakura could tell she was bored and wanted to get things done. However, her eyes were trained to Sakura's. She inwardly bit her lip and averted her gaze.

"Ah, you won't keep eye contact. It's either you're a weak person and feel uncomfortable in attempts at domination, or you're hiding something from me." Satouko pointed out and scribbled it down on her notepad. Sakura froze up and slowly moved her eyes back to Satouko.

"The neck muscles are tense…taken for surprise, perhaps?" The taller girl asked with a light smile. Sakura was finding it hard to keep calm with Satouko's tone. It was too friendly and suggestive for her liking. Sakura needed make her stop interrogating her and let her do her job, healing the village and getting information on the bandits. _But at this rate I can't get anywhere._ Sakura's mind began to quickly formulate a fool-proof lie about why she's so _depressed_. I can always say my mom died by bandits, or my father was abusive, or better yet that I'm an alcoholic because of the losses in my life. She mentally rolled her eyes but she had to choose one. She picked the first one. After all, a daughter is always close to her mom and would be more traumatized by that. Sakura's legs wrapped around the chair's legs and opened her mouth to have Satouko's finger flick up, hushing her.

"Don't even begin to lie to me." Satouko murmured as she intensely stared into Sakura's eyes. Her silver eyes narrowed.

"People who are ready to lie tend to wrap their legs around something. Think of it mentally wrapping the lie around the truth to make it more believable." Satouko sighed in exasperation before standing up and began to pace around the room. She didn't give Sakura a chance to think of an excuse.

"Haruno, I'm not sure what you did or what happened where you had to get a shrink but I need to do my job. Lying won't solve anything but make a bigger web of problems that'll you get stuck in. So tell me the truth. After all, I was part of ANBU for awhile. To be specific, the stealth and interrogation team," Satouko said slowly as she stopped near the window, parting the blinds with her fingers and staring off at Hikari.

"But that ended." She closed the blinds and turned around to face Sakura. The medic shinobi wasn't very fond that Hinata chose Satouko to talk to her.

"So either spill the beans or go to Hinata and say you didn't do anything. I'm not here to listen to some bullshit you made-up." Satouko bluntly stated as she walked near the coffee table's chair again. She stood beside it, waiting for an answer. Sakura bit her lip. She was stuck. She actually had someone who knew all the moves. Sakura was a terrible liar anyways. Sai, Naruto, and Ino knew that.

"I don't exactly feel comfortable talking."

Satouko sat back down in her seat and picked up her notebook. "How does that make you feel?"

A sweat drop went down Sakura's head as she stared at Satouko's serious face.

"Are you serious?"

Satouko looked from behind the pad and nodded. "It's actually very effective."

Sakura shook her head and leaned back. "It makes me feel…normal?"

Satouko scribbled something down. "So you usually don't talk about it?"

"No?"

"I see." Satouko hummed and wrote something else down. "Do you wish to talk about it?"

Sakura crossed her arms. Satouko noticed this and wrote it down. "No…if I had a choice then no."

"So I take it you don't feel the need to express it or show your faults?" Satouko asked. Sakura frowned.

"I don't think that's true. I just don't…it's just a bother and I—"

"From the tone of your voice it seems like you have some superiority complex." Satouko suggested and wrote down the possibility. Sakura blushed as the other woman winked at her from behind the notebook.

"I have it as well."

"I don't see how that's relevant, really." Sakura told. Satouko smiled.

"Oh, you don't know that. Little details make the best of paintings." Satouko mentioned. Sakura raised an eyebrow and shook her head.

"So do you feel like people are too dumb to understand your feelings? Or they're not worthy?" Satouko questioned as she played with the pen. Sakura held her tongue. Should she really even go along with this? There was nothing in it for her except Tsunade being able to see what's wrong with her. She'd get hell for it and being too _sensitive_ about things. Satouko seemed to read her mind.

"I'll make a deal. I will not ask too much of personal, detailed questions and you'll answer the ones that aren't too direct. Ok?" Satouko offered. Sakura wasn't sure on how to react. This woman before her was practically reading her like a book. Was ANBU that talented? Sure, she knew they weren't to be taken lightly but she didn't think they were _that _great.

"Sure." Sakura had nothing to lose. A little bit of small questions with small, random answers wouldn't solve anything.

"Answer my last question, please."

"I forgot what it was. Repeat it?" Sakura asked as she got comfortable in her chair, awaiting the assault of questions. Satouko began to quickly scribble more into the notebook.

"Do you feel like people understand your feelings or just don't? Do they not deserve to know your feelings?" Satouko restated. Sakura took a few moments to answer.

"No, I don't think they understand the…feelings. They might have an idea but not truly know what it is. And no, they don't deserve to know it if they can't accept that it's with me just like all their bad habits." Sakura replied with satisfaction. It wasn't that hard to give some answers and bash the people who looked down on her, not giving names or anything.

Satouko stopped writing and looked back up, closely examining Sakura

"So, Sakura-Chan," she said slowly and carefully. Sakura felt a little worried with her different tone. "Are you saying that your depression cannot be cured or are you giving up hope to solve it?"

Sakura remained quiet as she met Satouko's gaze. That was a very straightforward question. No, it can't be helped. _My…faults are here to stay like Hikari's hotheadedness, Kenji's loudness, Chikako's shy attitude, Anshi's ghostly features, and Satouko's conceitedness._ It was part of her personality. It's what shaped her up to the success she is now. Without the depression she wouldn't have worked hard to become an expert in the medical career to save lives. Without it she wouldn't have been in the hospital as much, wouldn't have saved as many lives as she did today. But she couldn't tell Satouko that. She searched in the other girl's eyes. There was nothing she could decipher that'd tell her if it was worth saying or not. Sakura's mind repeated the question and blinked. Satouko wouldn't understand her point of view on it. She would think it was a worse type of depression.

"That's too much for now, Haruku." Sakura lightly warned. Satouko nodded and scribbled more things down.

"And that's all for today." She yawned and stood up, stretching and smiling. "If you want, you can look at my notes. What I know is what you should know."

Sakura was surprised that the younger woman would offer her notebook. The medic shinobi nodded, almost eagerly. She always wondered how shrinks thought and worked. Satouko casually threw the notebook to Sakura and exited the cabin. She could hear the woman call out to Hikari and hear the other girl scold her. Soon the world around her was blocked out as she opened the notebook. Sakura would be able to see what was being recorded about her. As the page opened up her eyes quickly scanned the page and absorbed the information.

Sakura's eyes widened as she dropped the notebook. Her hands shook as her eyes were glued to the paper.

_What was the meaning of this?_

* * *

"Kenji, take to the east bank. Hikari go ahead and scout along the river. Satouko stay nearby in the brush, hide your chakra. Chikako, you stay behind in the village as we scout. Sakura come along just in case there are casualties." Anshi ordered as the group departed. Everyone but Anshi and Chikako left from the spot. The group wasn't too far before Sakura peeked over her shoulder, trying to see why Anshi was lagging. She saw Chikako say something Anshi, he nodded, and they gave each other a brief kiss. Sakura frowned and looked away without much comment.

"Lovebirds." Kenji huffed. Satouko smiled and loudly smacked him in the back.

"Stop being such a downer!" She cheered. Kenji glared at her.

"I'm not being a downer!"

"Oh but you are! You're jealous because the love is in the air and you have none!" Satouko announced to the world. Kenji blushed and growled at her. Hikari smirked as she draped an arm around Satouko's lower back, hazardously near her rear.

"Except those one-night stands from the girls at those clubs." She added. Satouko teasingly gasped in surprise and laughed. Kenji turned redder. Sakura looked over him.

"You go to clubs?" She asked with a hint of disappointment. Any shinobi that went to clubs was a disgrace for letting their desires get to them. Clubs were infested with spies from other villages that were just waiting for a chance to jump a drunken shinobi to interrogate.

Kenji flinched and cowered near Satouko. "Yeah?"

Sakura just turned away and didn't say anything else. Satouko looked at Hikari.

"I like the fact Anshi made you bait. And look, he even gave you some skimpy, slut clothes." Satouko smirked as her hand lightly patted Hikari's ass. She glared.

"It's to lure the bandits. You know they like to rape hot girls." She boasted with a prideful smirk. Satouko gasped and turned towards Sakura.

"We better hide Sakura-Chan! I'm sure Hikari can run out there naked and the bandits won't get her." She stuck her tongue out. Kenji busted out laughing at the burn as Sakura's cheeks burned like fire. Hikari hissed and began to pound Satouko down in the ground.

"Ah! My dearest, be nice! I'm only being polite!" Satouko relentlessly giggled as Anshi caught up.

"Enough goofing off, we need to find the bandits." He ordered as he walked between Kenji and Sakura. Satouko saluted.

"Yes Sir Stick-Up-Ass." Satouko teased her little cousin. He frowned and refrained from bickering with her. Hikari crossed her arms and followed along. Sakura examined her from the corner of her eye. She was wearing only bandages around her sizable chest and a short mini-skirt. She looked like a hobo trying to be a stripper if anything.

"More like Sir Have-sex-when-we-have-sex." Hikari mentioned. Anshi's face immediately turned red. Satouko let out a sound of recognition.

"Oh yeah! I heard you two when I was giving Hikari a—"

"Shut up, you idiot!" Hikari growled. Satouko rolled her eyes.

"Yeah, anyways, I heard you guys going at it too. That bed you guys have is a little squeaky. Hey…talking about that…Why did Sakura-Chan not get mad at those two?" Satouko pointed an accusing finger at the obviously beet-red Anshi.

Sakura felt her face get redder. "I didn't hear them."

"Oh man!" Satouko whined. "They even continued after we stopped! They're just so quiet like bunnies! You know why bunnies don't make sounds while having sex?" Satouko quickly asked with a big, goofy smile. Kenji frowned.

"Why?"

"COTTON BALLS!" Satouko yelled. Kenji gave a perverted smile and giggled. Hikari and Anshi rolled their eyes as Sakura remained quiet. This was odd. _Very, very odd_. It was like when she peered inside of Satouko's notebook…Sakura squeezed her eyes shut. The mental image was stuck inside of her head.

Kenji threw Sakura to the ground as a kunai whizzed by her face, barely missing her head. He yelled something. Sakura didn't understand. She was still in shock. Hikari boldly ran forward, doing hand-seals and releasing a wave of fire. Anshi summoned his water boars. Kenji quickly grabbed the kunai off the ground and ran forward. Satouko was already searching for the enemies. Sakura could only see the sky and hear the sounds of people yelling.

"Where are they?"

"Shit! I can't detect anything!" She heard Satouko complain. Hikari quipped at something.

It was only until Anshi went to her and asked if she was alright when she was aware where she was again. Sakura shot up; ignoring Anshi's helping hand and pulling out a shuriken. Her eyes darted around the forest. Where were they? She knew there was more than one. She could feel it in the air.

"Oi! Breakfast!" A loud, whiny voice yelled out. It sounded like a kids. Sakura didn't have time to track the voice when dozens of small bodies hurled out of the trees. Her eyes widened when they landed on the ground, holding oversized clubs.

"MIDGETS?" Satouko yelled in surprise. Kenji stopped in his tracks as his mouth hit the ground.

"What the hell!" He exclaimed as Hikari died of laughter. Anshi stood his ground with Sakura. One of the small men threw a mini-tantrum.

"God dammit! We're not midgets! It's natural! We're from the Oso Clan and are here to claim the land that's rightfully ours!" It yelled in fury. Kenji giggled. The legion of small people glared at him.

"Take it from us if you can." He teased. The clan members screamed and began to huddle into a big group. Their hands burst into chakra as they touched each other. Sakura's eyes watched as their bodies turned into liquid and went into each other, growing into one, big mass. Kenji gawked.

"No fucking way."

Satouko smirked. "Interesting."

Anshi began to form more seals and suspiciously summoned an electrical fox to hide behind his boars. Sakura watched as the midgets formed together to create a giant that loomed over them, its shadows covering them. It thunderously laughed, shaking the ground.

"GET SOME!" The giant yelled.

Kenji dropped his kunai as Satouko shook her head.

"Someone crapped their pants…"

* * *

**A/N:**

I will say that we're going to have quite a few chapters until Ino finally comes along so don't get too excited, but I assure you Ino will come and you guys will like it! Please be patient with me! I'm getting a little impatient for some InoSaku too but I need to write this small Kenji Arc.

Read and Review please!


	10. A Warm Breeze Through Her Icy Tundra

Anshi stood back, analyzing the situation as Kenji ran forward, screaming like a blood thirsty Viking. He held two kunais in each hand, both with an explosive tag. Hikari growled.

"Get back here, dumbass!" She yelled at him but he ran forward with a triumphant smile.

"TAKE THIS!" He threw the tags at the giant. The kunais whizzed at high speeds, the tags flapping like a glorious flag through the storm and hit the monster. The kunais deflected off the thick skin. The creature hissed in delight.

"Good one." Satouko commented before disappearing. Sakura couldn't track where she went but it couldn't be too far.

"Weapons are of no use!" Kenji came sprinting back as the beast chased after him like a baby walking on its feet for the first time. Hikari turned towards him.

"You're so useless!"

"I CAN SAY THE SAME, YOU OL' BITCH!" Kenji screamed. Sakura's eyes widened.

"MOVE!" She grabbed Hikari's arm and tried to tug as the enormous foot's shadow closed in on them. Hikari swatted the grasp away and looked up, her eyes widening. Sakura tried to grab at her arm again until she heard a loud crash. She readjusted her eyes to the green foliage as the giant's back was to them. Sakura noticed that the giant looked like a troll out of the fairy tales. She also noticed she wasn't crushed by the foot and neither was Hikari. In fact, they were both in the arms of Satouko who was smirking. Hikari was clinging for dear life while Sakura was limp, except for a desperate hand that clung onto her chest.

"Feisty in battle," Satouko's smirk turned toothy as she looked at Sakura in the corner of her eye. She froze and turned red. Hikari leaned over and glared. "I like."

"No-no no! I'm sorry!" Sakura squeaked and jumped out of Satouko's hold. "Thank you but no…I was…I was scared and grabbed your hand because I woul—Yeah." Sakura quickly darted away to Hikari boiling and Satouko giggling like a schoolgirl. Returning to battle, she spotted Kenji still running around and Anshi standing nearby. Sakura noticed the beast wasn't paying her any attention. She sped up and charged at it, her fist cocked to the side, loaded for a punch. She just needed to concentrate enough chakra in one blow. She neared the foot as her arm went further around and her torso turned in the opposite direction of the punch. The beast turned as it felt the immense chakra burst as the punch landed onto its ankle. The bone inside broke as the beast howled in pain. Everyone's eyes widened as it went down, landing near Anshi and Kenji. Tears broke from the giant's eyes as it trembled and quaked, rubbing the wound.

"Oh! Oh! Oh!" It repeated in a pained voice. The giant rolled around, holding its ankle. Kenji smirked and jumped on top of it, climbed till he was on its nose.

"YEAH!" He boasted and marched across the nose, doing random dance moves. To end his performance, he jumped in the air and landed directly into the giant's eye. It yowled and squeezes its eyes shut. Kenji's face went white as he screamed.

"MY ANKLES!"

The creature laughed then began to cry more as Kenji fell into its eye and couldn't move. Anshi glared.

"Idiot," he snarled before going up and retrieving him. Sakura watched with a scowl. The giant was already down and Kenji decided to do a victory lap on it. For some reason, it bit a nerve inside of her.

"Dammit, he broke his own ankles." Anshi growled. Sakura rolled her eyes as he dragged Kenji behind him, who whined loudly. No wonder why he came in critical condition like last time, he was beyond immature for the battlefield. Sakura didn't notice until Hikari spoke up that the other two were by her.

"Well, you better finish him off." Hikari spoke and walked away, seeming to have simmered down from accidently groping— Sakura blushed again and her anger disappeared.

"Just a quick punch with that brute force up into the nose and the shards should lodge into the brain and bam, the beasty be dead." Satouko winked and tugged Hikari away. Sakura stared at them. They were just going to give her the kill? She glared at them.

She didn't want to kill the thing. She never wanted to kill anyone…Satouko turned with sudden seriousness that made Sakura hope that she was going to offer help.

"You going to do it or do you want me to?" A hint of challenge was in her voice. Sakura felt intimidated, underestimated by the other girl who proved her speed was enough. She could sense the tension in her shoulders and jaw as her pride burned.

"I will do it." The words were out of her mouth before she knew it and she was already on top of the monster. Her legs dragged themselves to the creature's nose as it wheezed out words. It was aware of how it was going to happen. Its skin was tense and sweat dripped down in the size of puddles.

"For all of sacred…" Its voice murmured under its shivering, short breaths as Sakura stood on the bridge of its nose. The eyes were closed. She gave a good stomp, startling the beast as it looked up at her, into the sunlight. Despite the brightness, its eyes widened.

"Kokoro," it chanted. "Blood red hair…life…"

Sakura was confused. What was it saying?

"Do you need my help, princess?" Satouko called out to. Sakura glared at her and quickly her fist rocketed into its nose. The cartilage broke and penetrated into the brain as blood gushed out. Sakura's feet were stained with the…green steam? Her eyes widened as she quickly jumped away and threw off her shoes. The green liquid on it bubbled and ate away the shoes. Her breath was quick and frightened. _That was close_. Satouko and Hikari giggled and began to walk away, making small, witty comments about Sakura and how she was too careful, not caring if she could hear them or not. She hopped down and slowly followed them to Kenji and Anshi.

A large gust of wind blew against their backs as their hairs prickled and eyes widened. A burst of chakra was sent through their bodies, stealing away their breath. Anshi craned his neck back and gritted his teeth.

"Prepare yourselves. It's not dead." He hissed. Sakura furrowed her brows and glanced back. She dealt a killing blow! How could that thing still be standing? She stared at it. Something was boiling in its skin like crawling insects. She stiffened and got into a fighting stance.

"I thought you killed it, Sakura." Satouko teased. Sakura's eyes narrowed. She didn't want to deal with this teasing. It was immature and only made her more aggravated. Hikari stood behind Satouko, observing with a light smirk.

Without warning the creature burst, pieces of flesh flying into the air before dissolving into steaming green toxic in midair. Anshi quickly did hand signs and enveloped Kenji and him into a watery barrier. Hikari gasped as Satouko began to dodge, running past as the acid rained upon them. Sakura panicked. What could she do? It was acid! A large shadow covered her entire body as she shook. There was something Kakashi told them, something to protect them from acid, but what the hell was it? Sakura didn't have time to think as a water barrier soaked her up. Sakura stared wide eyed as Satouko held up her hand signs and narrowly dodged another large drop. The acid sprayed onto Satouko as she ran back, towards a heap covered in green acid.

_Hikari! _Sakura trudged through the thick barrier, trying to escape. She had to save her. Her medical instincts began to kick in. The instinct for survival and putting teammates before anything overcame her selfish nature of being safe. She broke through the barrier and went running towards the two, acid still falling from the sky. Sakura punched at the ground, sending boulders into the air to briefly protect her. She continued to sprint towards the two. A large drop of acid was about to land above Satouko.

"Satouko!" Sakura yelled. "RUN!"

Satouko covered Hikari with her body and looked up, eyes wide like a scared animal. The acid landed on her as she hugged Hikari close to her body and protected her lover. Sakura charged towards them, medical pouch out and ready. Anshi and Kenji ran towards them as the last of the acid fell and sunk into the earth.

Sakura skidded to a halt as she motioned Anshi to dump water on them. He forced a water barrier around the two, trying to soak up the acid into the water before releasing the jutsu as Sakura collected the girls into her arms, heaving them up with her unnatural strength, and sprinting back to the village. Anshi and Kenji were in awe at the brute strength but quickly ran after her.

Sakura's eyes were hazy. _Risking your life for her…What were you thinking? She would've been fine afterwards after a little bit of washing. The acid wasn't that severe. _She glanced down at the two girls who were unconscious in her arms. Satouko struggled, coughing up water and acid. _That's no good. She inhaled the liquid. _Satouko writhed. Her body shook.

Sakura watched as she sprinted with amazement as the older girl cracked her eyes, found Hikari, and shakily grabbed the other's hand and held it before going back unconscious again. Sakura felt her stomach negatively churn at the action.

_Stupid, stupid, stupid!_

* * *

Sakura stared at the two girls who rested in their bed. She had just finished operating on the two of them. Satouko was injured the worst with internal injuries from the acid. Hikari had minor. Sakura sat in a crude wooden chair, monitoring her teammates. There weren't any advanced medical supplies here to properly treat them. Sakura's gaze dropped. As if by some sappy love novel, Satouko never took her hand away from Hikari's. It was as if they were cemented together.

Sakura stood up and went back to the lights for the hundredth time. She turned them off with sad eyes and watched as the girls' bodies glowed like fireflies. The acid was something she never saw before. It was a new chemical Sakura had discovered that her medical journals did not cover. It was odd and brilliant. Sakura turned back on the lights and returned to her seat, continuing to stare at the two.

"You could've just run away with her, Satouko." Sakura said. "You were fast enough."

"You had to play the hero, huh?" Her whisper haunted the room. Sakura remembered what Kenji had explained. She used to be in the ANBU, apparently one of the top fifty out of thousands, but she threw it away for this girl. Sakura analyzed them. Satouko was obviously older than the two, by how many years? Sakura didn't know. She would guess around three to five. The girl was still between being an old teenager and young adult, but she acted like a child. _How could anyone fall for someone with such a bad mouth and hot temper? _Sakura hated people who were overconfident. _Sakura-Chan! _Well, most of them anyways. But Hikari was on a whole different level. She was weak in many aspects of the shinobi way but still acted like she could take on the world. It didn't make sense. What kept her so confident? Sakura's eyes glided over to Satouko. Their hands twitched in each other's grasp. Kenji disappeared.

"What made you guys like each other?" Sakura asked. They were both hot heads and over confident, but Satouko having the right and Hikari not. One worked hard and the other stood back and watched. One wildly flirted with her and the other got jealous. It seemed like there was too much fire in the relationship to keep it going. It didn't make sense to Sakura. With how much they've been together and how much they fought, wouldn't the desire burn out? Was it even love or was it lust?

Sakura stiffened as Satouko's red eyes slightly opened again. She rolled over to face Hikari. Sakura remained quiet, wondering what she was going to do. Satouko's spare hand went up to cup Hikari's face, caressing it before sliding a sole finger to the girl's lips and tracing.

"Hikari…"

The other girl woke up like she was in a deep sleep. Her eyes heavy as she rapidly blinked, trying to stay awake.

"Satouko..."

Satouko's eyes watered as she drew close to Hikari. Sakura's eyes widened as the smaller one held Satouko's head into her chest and sleepily rubbed her head. They both quickly fell asleep.

Sakura's eyes hazed over as she stood up, finally deciding to exit the room. They were going to be ok. They'd live. She went to the light and turned it off. She glanced back with a sad frown.

"What made you two fall in love?"

* * *

"How's the wheelchair for you?" Anshi asked. Kenji glared at him as the white haired man smiled.

"OH SHUT UP ALREADY!"

"Can you two ever get along?" Chikako sighed and shook her head, rubbing her temples in hope of curing her headache. "Worse than children."

Anshi sniffled as Kenji waved her off.

"Tell your husband that. He's being a total—"

"How are you feeling, Kenji?" Sakura asked. Kenji lightened up and rolled his way over.

"Good! Thanks for patching me up!" He pointed toward his feet. "I should be better in no time!"

"You'll be down for around two months or more. Give or take." Sakura reminded. Kenji's face whitened.

"What will I do for that long?" He asked in horror. Anshi smiled.

"Eat tubs of ice cream, watch chick flicks, and gossip with Hik-…" Anshi closed his mouth in guilt at remembering Hikari's and Satouko's conditions. Chikako stopped making dinner and leaned against the kitchen's doorframe.

"How are they, Sakura?" She asked in deep concern.

Sakura frowned as she took a seat on a cushioned chair. "Not looking too well but good enough." She remembered their endearing moment with sad eyes.

"I never saw any acidic chemical like that. It's new to me. We need to finish up our work here quickly and return them to the hospital in Konoha." She stated. Anshi shook his head.

"That trip is easily a three days worth, but having to carry them would take longer." He reminded. Sakura sighed.

"I can't even carry that big of a load that far." Sakura bit her lip. They couldn't go back empty handed. It was against the shinobi rules even during dire situations like this. Tsunade wouldn't be too happy.

"What should we do?" Chikako asked. Sakura glanced to the wall.

"All we can do is hope and get this done fast."

"How though? We don't even have a lead on the bandits! We don't even have our jail bait anymore." Kenji blurted. Chikako growled at him and threw a shoe at the injured man.

"Even though me and Hikari disagree, I wouldn't talk about her like that! She could….She could be severely ill!" Chikako swiftly corrected. Everybody knew what she was going to say and it left a dead silence in the room. Sakura ended it.

"We have to just try our best. Satouko and Hikari depend on us."

* * *

**A/N:  
Short chapter but finals are killing my muse to write. Especially english, good gawd. Anyways, thought I'd update and summer is about here! SO CLOSE! That's when the updates will be pouring in.**

Read and Review!


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